Attention

short story about one's feelings

Attention, I want it as well. What can be done to make someone gaze upon you? Probably to look at them with kind teary eyes, I did too, stared for hours at the cold white lifeless face. No matter what the time or the expression, I always looked up to it, even when the time came where nothing could be seen. But nothing changed. In the end, though it was late, I realized all this time I was only staring at my own shadow on my bedroom wall.

From then on, I changed my mind and decided to look out the only window I had. The world I live in had no exit to the outside world; my room had no door, only the window was my only hope. I crawled myself up to the window glass, a chilly touch on my forehead, and the fresh smell of new air that sipped through the broken hole made me unusually excited. I leaped a bit higher and stole a slight gaze out of it. Few bags full of words could describe what I saw, nothing new though, yet everything impressed me to the content of smelling a brand new perfume.

I could have a view of everyone’s life from the attic room that nobody understands to see. How wonderful! A joyful boy of thoughtlessness ran around the town’s square aimlessly, tripping on nothing but the empty road amusingly. His mother, I thought of on other hand, was out of clue what her silly child was up to, gossiping and bragging with the neighborhood lady about her new hand bag; nevertheless, at the end, they all play the serious part in their little trip outside. The same boy now started to cry out of fear of being lost and separated from his mother and on time, the hilarious air around her shifted into desperate attire, the mother started to shout out with the name so dear to her in the very fear of losing him. All this is so very usual.

When all this drama was over, the birds flew away across the fountain towards their homes, and only the beeping broken light bulb allowed me to see the only one sleeping under no tree. A collarless dog, hungry and thin, probably spending his last breathe, no one to be there by his side it thought, but still could not feel my warm gaze from afar. As the light dimmed away, the night became black; I still stared at it till the very end. I thought one day I shall go on a trip and visit the outside, to the very town’s square I just saw, but that would not change the fact I kept staring out this window, rather at last, I would find out why nobody can see me.

 

Reviews

[Courtney]

This reminds me of myself. I really enjoyed the story. I came out of a very abusive relationship and for the first time since college I live at home. I live in the attic. I rarely leave. I hear people outside, talking, laughing, having fun and I want to join but instead I watch and listen. PTSD keeps me a prisoner. This story may not be meant to embody what I am going through and what I feel but it certainly fits with my life and my feelings and so I enjoyed it very much. I also like your writing style. :)

[GreySmile]

Thank you for the review and for your encouraging words. It feels nice that you like my writing as well.