The Doctor's Letter

Gerald, a senior citizen who still regularly turns out every Saturday to play along with the rest of us 'younger' guys and loves every minute !!

Though never better, I received a doctor's letter
requesting a visit routine,
puzzled all the same, regarding it's aim
to the surgery, I did convene

Reporting at reception, I was accused of deception
"you're not listed here," a lady remarked,
"this cannot be, here's a letter from my GP
though no regular caller," I barked

"Well my good fella, I'll have to go to the cellar"
the secretary grumpily said,
after one hour, she returned even more sour
holding a tattered folder of red

"Now sir please listen, you're not on our system
but it's clear from this old file,
although certainly latent, you once were a patient
so Dr Barker will see you, in a short while"

Whilst sat outside his room, I grew aware of the gloom
as folk waited to be seen,
transfixed to mobile phones, like listless drones,
awaiting a pardon from the queen

In turn, each through the door, then back out as before
still calling and texting,
clutching paper prescriptions, for various afflictions
a due process, I found rather vexing

Soon my turn, to meet a doctor looking stern
weary of the daily regime,
but he broke into a smile, noting the name on the file
"come in, sit down, I want to come clean"

I personally looked you up, from your name on a cup
my grandfather kept in his study,
he was once your GP, and I further decree
a past teammate and buddy

He often spoke of your strong-will and athletic skill
combined, to defeat any foe,
yet down through the years, despite blood, sweat and tears
to his general practice, you'd never go

Now forty years on, how can you go so long
without ever a sick day,
regularly seen, out on the village green,
still playing and plugging away? "

"Now young Dr Barker, let me put down a marker
as to why, I remain free of all ills,
play the game hard but fair, with gusto and flare,
to negate the need for any pills

Always bat straight, to narrow the gate
and bowl to the sweat drips from your brow,
for the simple trick to it, is to keep playing cricket
so look me up, in another forty years from now ! "

 

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Author's Note

Sub note: Playing with a straight bat makes it very difficult for the ball to pass between it and the pads, (batsman's legs) to get him out ! That space between same is known as 'the gate'

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

Tom,
"The doctor's letter' was just a kick' to read! A person having something that they can feel passionate about is all important. Health and vitality are connected in what drives us. You have shared a message that really is an iinspiration and needed in this modern day. Blessings Kathy

[Tom]

You nailed it Kathy & thanks for commenting so appropriately!

[Monica Garcia]

You have so many amazing things going on here. I really love how you can so naturally tell a story while simultaneously keeping the rhythm, flow, and progression of the piece. :) I truly envy such talent. Thank you for sharing.

[Tom]

Thank you Monica for you generous appraisal !

[Norman T]

Sometimes I wish that my records could also be lost in the mists of time. They will keep following up on a minor stroke that I had 25 years ago. Since then I have followed the example that you quoted and at 85 I'm fitter than most of the medical staff. Loved the upbeat and lyrical style of your narrative too.

Norman

[Tom]

Thanks Norman and great to hear from you again, thought you'd emigrated or something silly like that ? Lol...

[Lydia Shutter]

The character study of the older gent is just delightful. I think I would like to get to know him. He has such a will to keep on going and to keep up with the younger generation. No pills....that is the way to go for sure. A very humorous write that kept me smiling. The flawless rhyme makes it a joy to read. Sorry I missed this when you originally posted it, Tom. Happy New Year to you. Lydi**

[Tom]

Yes you've summed him up perfectly Lydia, and thanks as ever for your favourable comments 😀

[JayceeC]

I actually read this gem earlier in the day, when I responded to yours and then became sidetracked by other things.
I enjoyed theirs narrative poem of yours. Although I don't see a static meter, there is a rolling rhythm and cadence that I do enjoy. It lends itself to being read aloud. The protagonist is quite amusing. He's the older gentleman that lives to go play and because he does he's in excellent shape and health.
I like the laugh that the clinic has passed from generation to generation without him realizing it. The spirit of this wrote was amusing and entertaining, but more than that it leaves you with the sense of admiration for the spirit this man shows and the honor the young doctor shows.

[Tom]

Yes indeed Jaycee, you have summed up my poem's very raison d' etre with succinct accuracy and grateful I am for your perceptive review!

[JayceeC]

You are welcome. I am glad you showed up on my page today and I stopped by to read this.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Tom... thanks for explaining the gate.
Curiosity is my claim to surviving🎭
explaining my waiting for the pearly gate.
truly, Pat

[Tom]

Thank you Pat for your always welcome visit & positive review of my poem !

[Woody]

aaah I missed your writes and sense of humour, Tom. love this one.
I'm getting on in years so I'm taking up cricket as a new hobby. you've convinced me.

[Tom]

Good man Woody, you know it makes sense ?? Lol..

And thanks for reading and favourable comments !

[Dean]

nice work, and a great idea for a poem. Obviously you had fun with it.

[Tom]

Yes, I sure did Dean, it's actually based on a true life character at our cricket club, 79 years young, still playing a bit and enjoying the game !

[AYVID N]

Hi Tom! What a delightful poem. The rhyming is bang on and there is such a cheerful feel to it, not to mention the greatt storyline. It kept me glued the page till the very end and then made me smile. I read it aloud s second time and it felt even better. All in all a lovely read with great entertainment value.

[Tom]

Thank you Divya for your inspiring review and always welcome visit !

[marilyn 1225]

love this story poem told with flare and spirit and great sklll for written word
wonder if I can share this with my son who sponsored and brought over the cricket players called the All Stars to the USA for three different matches... he will love this poem and might share it with them of course this privilege is up to you. great writing and fun

[Tom]

Thank you Marilyn for dropping by and your most cordial comments !

[Tom]

Ps. Yes indeed, share & share alike !

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahaha! the ol' goat! ;) great wisdom and advice to take to the green ..stay active strong and flexible .. its the very best we can do!
E.

[Tom]

You're right there EN & thanks for your welcome visit !