Message in a bottle !

One for us poor much maligned, henpecked chaps, I think it deserves another airing ?

It's but a fading memory now
that fateful night I fell overboard,
no longer can I even recall
my reason to cross that perilous fjord!

But when that sudden, freakish wave
knocked me into an unforgiving sea,
not one single crew member was aware
of what had become of me!

With desperate cries I implored that schooner
to about starboard turn,
though she sailed briskly onwards
till no longer, could I see her wooden stern!

So I closed my eyes and prayed aloud
as a swirling vortex sucked me under,
what would the next life hold in store
my prevailing, final wonder?

I'll never know quite how I survived
for next I felt warm sunlight on my skin
and anxiously I glanced around
but my fear quickly subsided with a gleeful grin!

As hapless upon a desert beach I lay
slung between two maidens, fine and fair,
as one removed my sodden clothes
whilst the other leant my head, against her bosom bare!

As previously alluded this catastrophe
occurred, now so many years ago,
and forever since I've been marooned here,
I really ought to build a wooden boat and go!

But rather, I’ll place a message in a bottle,
then throw it far out into the wandering tide
in hope forlorn one day it maybe found,
and I'll be rescued from this dominion, over which I preside!

So until that praised be, glorious day arrives
I'll carry on and make the best of all this strife,
there’s plenty of nourishment and coconut milk here
to sustain me for the rest of my natural life!

And as for those fine maidens fare
who revived me upon that golden sand,
they're the only natives on this island
and before encountering me, never before had seen a man !

Reviews

[Monica Garcia]

Haha, I feel like I may have detected a tad bit of sarcasm near the end there when the character sends out his message in a bottle. I related this poem so well to my own life, when we think the world is ending, and then we realize we are on this unexpected path in this unexpected place, and suddenly, well, it might not seem so bad after all, and the plans we had in our lives before might not matter so much anymore. I thought a bit on the last stanza:

And as for those fine maidens fare
who revived me upon that golden sand,
they're the only natives on this island
and before encountering me, never before had seen a man !

I love love love the way you ended this...with a beginning, really. To me I saw it as a starting point to building a new world. Starting from scratch and ruling the land. Definitely goes down as a favorite. Thank you for sharing.

[Tom]

Thank you Monica for your perceptive review and mutual understanding of my poem 😀

[J Todd Underhill]

Wow another one that is an epic write, these are great works deserving of recognition.

[Tom]

Thank you Sir !

[Neville]

Hey Tom my much valued literary friend, you are quite right, this work of yours certainly does deserve a good old airing or re-airing if there is such a thing.

I am so pleased to have checked your 'Message in a bottle' out. Fantasies, are of course made of such stuff & quite rightly so. If this is more than fantasy, you are a lucky bloke, if nothing but, you are still a chap to envy...............N

[Tom]

Thank you Neville for your perceptive review of my little poetic fantasy ???

[Angad Waraich]

Love the flow, and enjoyed the story.
A beautiful piece.
Thank you for sharing

[Tom]

A very belated thank you Angad for you visit and appreciative comments !

[Angad Waraich]

You're most welcome.

[AYVID N]

This is such a cute fantasy Tom. Sometimes, I feel this could be the favorite fantasy every man has.So he gets treated like a king what with two comely virgins who had never seen a man before. But the strife...that must be hilarious! You could write a sequel on that. Once again your fine story telling skills come to the fore as does your impeccable rhyming. Just loved this read and more! Keep smiling!

[Tom]

Thank you DIVYA for your wonderful summation of my little story/poem !

[AYVID N]

You are welcome Tom. It was a very fun and entertaining read and so elegantly done.

[K Scott Smith]

An interesting write. Well written and carried through. Good write

[Tom]

Thank you Sir !

[Norman T]

Wow, Tom. I was so breathless after this naughtycal tale, I think your poem should be re-titled as "The Prime of the Latent Stamina". Loved it!!

Norman

[Tom]

Very droll Norman and thanks again for stopping by !

[Katho28]

Love the pace of this poem! Flows so seamlessly, so energetic!

[Tom]

Thank you Kath !

[A. Amos]

I always enjoy your poetic stories, this was another magnum-opus!

[Tom]

Thank you A. worthy praise indeed from such a gifted writer as yourself!

[A. Amos]

You're most welcome buddy...

[Samuel Dickens]

Whoopee! Oh, boy is this great little story! Titillating, it is, to this old ex-sailor's ears. Marooned on a desert Isle with a couple of mermaids--now that's a survival tale.

[Tom]

Thank you Samuel for your welcome visit and yes indeed, I can see how this write would have even extra appeal to a man maritime man !

[Mary Bosworth]

This is absolutely beautiful and interesting all at once .. The wizardy of your words is absolutely stunning

[Tom]

Thank you warmly Mary !