Message in a bottle !

One for us poor much maligned, henpecked chaps, I think it deserves another airing ?

It's but a fading memory now
that fateful night I fell overboard,
no longer can I even recall
my reason to cross that perilous fjord!

But when that sudden, freakish wave
knocked me into an unforgiving sea,
not one single crew member was aware
of what had become of me!

With desperate cries I implored that schooner
to about starboard turn,
though she sailed briskly onwards
till no longer, could I see her wooden stern!

So I closed my eyes and prayed aloud
as a swirling vortex sucked me under,
what would the next life hold in store
my prevailing, final wonder?

I'll never know quite how I survived
for next I felt warm sunlight on my skin
and anxiously I glanced around
but my fear quickly subsided with a gleeful grin!

As hapless upon a desert beach I lay
slung between two maidens, fine and fair,
as one removed my sodden clothes
whilst the other leant my head, against her bosom bare!

As previously alluded this catastrophe
occurred, now so many years ago,
and forever since I've been marooned here,
I really ought to build a wooden boat and go!

But rather, I’ll place a message in a bottle,
then throw it far out into the wandering tide
in hope forlorn one day it maybe found,
and I'll be rescued from this dominion, over which I preside!

So until that praised be, glorious day arrives
I'll carry on and make the best of all this strife,
there’s plenty of nourishment and coconut milk here
to sustain me for the rest of my natural life!

And as for those fine maidens fare
who revived me upon that golden sand,
they're the only natives on this island
and before encountering me, never before had seen a man !

Reviews

[Monica Garcia]

Haha, I feel like I may have detected a tad bit of sarcasm near the end there when the character sends out his message in a bottle. I related this poem so well to my own life, when we think the world is ending, and then we realize we are on this unexpected path in this unexpected place, and suddenly, well, it might not seem so bad after all, and the plans we had in our lives before might not matter so much anymore. I thought a bit on the last stanza:

And as for those fine maidens fare
who revived me upon that golden sand,
they're the only natives on this island
and before encountering me, never before had seen a man !

I love love love the way you ended this...with a beginning, really. To me I saw it as a starting point to building a new world. Starting from scratch and ruling the land. Definitely goes down as a favorite. Thank you for sharing.

[Tom]

Thank you Monica for your perceptive review and mutual understanding of my poem 😀

[Einstein Noodle]

how can one enjoy being tossed into the sea...being sucked into the vortex .. oh....... its the island paradise .. and the maidens that do it :))))))))))))) i thought for sure this was going to be a poem that personifies the message in the bottle .. you surprised me .. for me its a little bit deeper into human nature .. though taken care of for life .. this man is not happy with what he has .. and send his hopes a sailing .. at the mercy of the Sea that delivered him already to shore .. lots of irony there my friend .. and you've given me and idea for a poem ;))))
E.

[Tom]

Wonderful interpret and outside the box thoughts E. Thank you my friend 🏅

[marilyn 1225]

an entertaining poem with great rhythm and rhyme what great talent and what a very good story too
fun to read I love your poetic style

[Tom]

Thank you Marilyn

[Valentine]

Hum, I would think the guy might have thought he had died and went to his own perception of heaven. Valentine

[Tom]

Yes indeed Valentine & thank you for your visit

[barleygirl]

Very playful well-written fairy tale, tongue-in-cheek thru-out. Your message was adorned with much imagery so it felt like we were watching this on a movie screen. Sophisticated word choices & mostly flowing rhyme & rhythm. Your ending leaves much to the imagination, in a deliciously teasing way.

[Tom]

A most belated thank you barleygirl for your perceptive analysis of my poetic reverie

[Aphy!]

Really intrigued after reading your "message in a bottle" and I must say it's very nice. I especially lovedd this line:But rather, I’ll place a message in a bottle,
then throw it far out into the wandering tide
in hope forlorn one day it maybe found,
and I'll be rescued from this dominion, over which I preside!
Again well done hey

[Tom]

Thank you Aphy

[-Scribe in Style-]

A great fantasy get away! The expression is clear and profound.
Sometimes I wonder if the tables were turned, if our life became our fantasies and we began to fantasize about about reality.
Def enjoyed the read.
A

[Tom]

An interesting perspective Arwa, and thanks again for your welcome visit.

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Fantasy is that part of our Utopia because of which we long to be there.
A beautiful poem and nice fantasy!

[Tom]

Thank you Jyoti !

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

You are welcome.

[Darkevin]

I must admit.... my heart BLEEDS for you! Anytime you would trade for MY heaven... don't feel the need to ask twice>>>>>>>>

[Tom]

If its all the same, think I'll stay here...lol but thanks for the visit!