The effect of today’s sins

The effect of today’s sins

A Poem by Tomoe Tellez
"

This is a poem I wrote for a villain of my novel "The written forgotten".

"

In the world of the living

Demons cannot win

In this heart full of hate

Love has arrived too late

For in my head rules the rage

That is caused by this new age

© 2015 Tomoe Tellez


Author's Note

Tomoe Tellez
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Featured Review

Hello Alondra, I have read somewhere that the best way to
Enhance your characters, are to write something About
them outside of the story. I've done it as well, I believe
It works. You've done it very well in this piece, very cool.
Thanks for the send'

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

Thank you very much for reading it! :D This isn't the only piece I've done, I hope to upload more in.. read more



Reviews

throw a chorus on it and flesh it out a bit farther, sell it to Pink, sit back and collect the rewards.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Hello Alondra, I have read somewhere that the best way to
Enhance your characters, are to write something About
them outside of the story. I've done it as well, I believe
It works. You've done it very well in this piece, very cool.
Thanks for the send'

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

Thank you very much for reading it! :D This isn't the only piece I've done, I hope to upload more in.. read more
Wow! Your use of colors and rhyme scheme really speak volumes in this poem. You've added a visual element to your work, and it pays off. Great job! Keep up the good work.

Posted 8 Years Ago


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B
i seen one too many times
sin leads to anger
And anger leads to the death of the human soul

taking peace away

Posted 8 Years Ago


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TM
I believe this is very true. Hate and anger really have taken everyone over recently and its really sad. I loved your colors in this poem, it really drove them forward a bit more. Good job!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

I tend to add a lot of color and glitter to everything I owe, hadn't done that with the first poems .. read more
Lots of colorful and powerful words. Sounds like an interesting character.... curious to see how the role plays out since there are some contradicting feelings. Heart full of hate yet love arrived too late. Will it change his heart or what will become of the love that has arrived. Interesting :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

*O*, I hope you like what I did with this character in the story, whom will be appearing pretty soon.. read more
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747
In me this strikes up an outburst of deteriorated rage. I'm not sure if I agree with the first 2 lines but the rest of it I find quite spot on for how I feel about our technology ruled society.
I also like the way you broke it up by using the colours. I like it, good job.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

You know the color was something I added at the end and it's something most people like about this p.. read more
It makes me consider the terminology of spirituality and myth, and the fact they depend upon time.
Or in other words, It leads me to the think about the current growth and fall of spiritual ideas that form a kind of community, and what that would mean for me as an individual.

I very much like the fact this is tied to your other work ,
by doing it in this way, you have given the story more depth. :)

Awesome!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

Thanks, I'm glad you thought about my story like that, I hope you like the character on which this i.. read more
i know i'm gonna be a bit biased on the negative side about this poem, only because I freaking love the topic of demons and most of that supernatural stuff, but I do have to admit that i like the flow of the piece. The highlighting of the words was also a pretty cool idea. Keep writing!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

Thanks a lot for your words, I glad you liked it!
A philosophy to live by, but I question your comment of love coming too late, the only way love would be too late is if it never comes at all. The depth of this is thought provoking and lingers in my thoughts, powerful even haunting, well done. Clap! Clap! Clap!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tomoe Tellez

8 Years Ago

Well, you're right, love is never too late, but sometimes the pain left by others is too deep and no.. read more
Bear

8 Years Ago

You would think so but find someone who never found love at all in there live and ask them if they w.. read more

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792 Views
15 Reviews
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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on November 12, 2015
Last Updated on November 12, 2015
Tags: demons, rage, hate, world

Author

Tomoe Tellez
Tomoe Tellez

About
I’ve always written stories of magical realms, but my fear didn’t let me share anything I wrote. I searched for this website in order to find out if I have any talent at all or if I&rsquo.. more..

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