When Pain Isn't Blood

Self-injury.

Pain - an oily black substance
that gets inside -

- Pain - so many tears I have cried

Scars on the inside
that no one can see.
There isn't anyone who believes
that there's something wrong with me.

Pain - There's just nothing that I feel.
Numb, so cold, numb and empty inside.
I think that somehow I have died.

- cut - I use my shiny razor blade.
Slice open my skin - bleed.
Hey! I must still be alive!
The dead cannot bleed.
Suddenly I can feel again.
The silver blade - My emotions have been freed!

Pain - my relief was only temporary.
But my using razor blades has become ongoing.
Scars on the outside for the world to see.
Instead of caring
now everyone is mad at me.

Pain - I can't weep tears from my eyes
but the blood I set free with my razor blade
are my blood tears.

- Pain

Will anyone ever notice me?
Will I ever feel again
without my razor blade to set my emotions free?

Reviews

[Sheila Kline]

You have expressed agony turned to relief with the flow of blood released by the cut of a razor blade with such emotion to cause me to feel its sting, and hear the sigh of relief when peace returns! I have become so distraught at times that I have explored different ways of gaining such peace, and can relate to your words! Some choose a bottle, others pills, spending sprees, and the list goes on and on. The end result may be the same. It is the method chosen by a "cutter" to let the steam kettle explode.
Excellent, emotional!!

[Morning Star]

I once knew a teen a friend of my son
who was so much in pain that he
would take a razor and cut himself to remind him
of his sadness and as you poem expresses
to set free his emotions and to remind him
to him it was like a map of his life
sorrow,till one day his teacher notice and asked me,i told her
His mother,never worries about him so his teacher sent him to see a counselor
he was suffering
of depression and turn to cutting,his know a fine happy young man
that is what your poem reminded me of
Beautifully written and express ------Hugssss