When Pain Isn't Blood

Self-injury.

Pain - an oily black substance
that gets inside -

- Pain - so many tears I have cried

Scars on the inside
that no one can see.
There isn't anyone who believes
that there's something wrong with me.

Pain - There's just nothing that I feel.
Numb, so cold, numb and empty inside.
I think that somehow I have died.

- cut - I use my shiny razor blade.
Slice open my skin - bleed.
Hey! I must still be alive!
The dead cannot bleed.
Suddenly I can feel again.
The silver blade - My emotions have been freed!

Pain - my relief was only temporary.
But my using razor blades has become ongoing.
Scars on the outside for the world to see.
Instead of caring
now everyone is mad at me.

Pain - I can't weep tears from my eyes
but the blood I set free with my razor blade
are my blood tears.

- Pain

Will anyone ever notice me?
Will I ever feel again
without my razor blade to set my emotions free?

Reviews

[Sheila Kline]

You have expressed agony turned to relief with the flow of blood released by the cut of a razor blade with such emotion to cause me to feel its sting, and hear the sigh of relief when peace returns! I have become so distraught at times that I have explored different ways of gaining such peace, and can relate to your words! Some choose a bottle, others pills, spending sprees, and the list goes on and on. The end result may be the same. It is the method chosen by a "cutter" to let the steam kettle explode.
Excellent, emotional!!

[Calypso]

You'd said it right. Sigh...

[Black Cat Fever]

This reads true to life, explaining in an honest fashion my self-injury is used by some people to help with distressing emotions even if it feels like the person isn't experiencing any emotions at all. This is great writing.

[Star Wolf]

Very honest and insightful poem on self-injury. We all need those who truly care and love us and help us back from these dark roads before we travel down them too far.

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

Very very sad indeed how many young and older people do this just to feel something! You expressed so much in this poem. Excellent poem

[KAREN]

This is an awful thing that many people suffer with. You have expressed the need of cutting and releasing emotions well.

[Poetic Beauty]

Those who truly suffer from this struggle day in and day out not to use cutting as a way to release negative emotions. It makes people see the scars and not the real person on the inside. It is a horrible condition for lack of a better word to have. People need to understand this and not think ill of the one who battle it day in and day out. This is written with strong knowledge of what it is like and those who deal with this need a strong support system to help them conquer the raging war inside.

[Wolf's Dark Song]

A very compelling poem filled with such raw pain. It seems we all find some way to deal with the pain, sometimes positive ways and sometimes not but they work for a while none the less. This is a really fantastic write.

[Sam Severn]

One of the best poems on this theme I have ever read on this site! Only one who has felt much love n' much sorrow could write so deeply, so honestly, n' so true. ㋡

[Coyote Poetry]

A hard and direct poem. Pain and blood can be part of a life. Easy to fall down. Harder to stand strong and fight. The poem description was strong and I like poetry that end with a question. A excellent poem.'
Coyote

[Marie Harrison]

Wow! This was very dark and disturbing, yet allowed me an inside
peek on why it feels good to cut. I can relate to the pain and the numbness.
I love the rawness of this poem. I didn't cringe either, which I usually do
with bloody poems.