Pg 5

  That Saturday night my sister took me to see her. She had slipped into a partial coma. I walked into the room, I saw my mother laying on the bed motionless with her eyes slightly open. I had a book in my hand which hit the floor. Then I saw her chest move as she was breathing so I slowly bend down to pick up my book. I walked over to her bed, sat beside her and started crying.
   I told her that everything was going to be okay if she just wanted to shut her eyes and slip away. I said we would all miss her like hell but we could not see her like this any longer. Because of the coma my mother could not speak she could only make noises. She would let me know she could hear me with a moan or rapid eye movement. That made me very happy to know that she could hear what I was saying and interact with me even tho she could not speak. Around 9pm that night I decided to leave so I gave my mother a kiss on the forehead and told her I would see her tomorrow.
   The next day I was sitting at home when my sister came to me and said mom was gone. The news didnt hit me as hard as I thought it would. We all knew it was going to happen. We just didnt know when, that was the hard part for me, not knowing. My sister asked me if I wanted to go see her as she had not yet left her room. I said that I wanted to not knowing if I could or not.
   As my sister and I were driving to the hospital I got butterflies in my tummy and I started feeling ill. My sister parked and told me she would catch up so I walked into the hospital down the long hallway telling myself that I could do this and that everything was going to be okay. When I got to the second floor my mothers best friend and husband were sitting outside her room. When I approached her she gave me a huge hug and told me she was very sorry.
   She then told me that my father was in her room with a pastor so I went through the door and went staright to him and gave him a huge hug. The pastor patted me on the back and said he would give us sometime alone. After I let go of my father I turned around to look at my mother. She looked so peacefull ...  like she was alseep altho she was not going to wake up. I sat beside her and rubbed her arm. My father went to the other side of the bed kissed her on the forehead and told her that he loved her. I joined my father and also kissed her on the forehead and told her that I loved her.
   For me seeing her laying in the bed like that helped me to deal with this terrible thing. I stoked her hair and smiled not because I was happy but because her Year of Hell was finally over. My mother Judy Lidgate passed away of Overain Cancer August 17th 2003 and I know where ever she is she is finally at peace.