"Judas Under God"

"Judas Under God"

A Poem by Tommy
"

Written for Robin's Contest "RANT" http://www.writerscafe.org/contests/Let-It-Out-/14395/

"

If you could, would you reach out, and let loose  

the suffocating noose? Open your eyes,

to the free sea of salty tears they’ve sold

belied? I’ve taut this neck, burning, seduced   

by abuse. Who will save us from the lies

of prudence they’ve swayed? Rich within con’s gold.

And the spittle, it poured as they bare sign,

raged at creation, which falls by design.

Sacrifice, not suffice, daughters and sons,

wanted for slaughter, seized, to feed their feast;.  

endless supper, there’s no washing of feet.

Treasonous non-anonymous hearts, spun  

to extreme; nuns stand at the pulpit, priests   

preaching for leaches, as the birds just tweet.  

Lend us your hungry, your weak, and your poor,

while we tell them, "We can’t give anymore!"  

© 2011 T.G. Hopkins III 




Orate - "Judas Under God"

© 2011 Tommy


Author's Note

Tommy
Yahoo! Image Detail for - http://www.rezo.ge/gallery/coffee/images/02_judastree_large.jpg
http://images.search.yahoo.com/images/vi...

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Oh excellent work, Tommy. What form and structure to add to the irony of society's dissolution. I loved the use of internal rhyme in the compact form, so many clever touches:

Treasonous non-anonymous hearts, spun
to extreme; nuns stand at the pulpit, priests
preaching for leaches, as the birds just tweet.

Strong, strong piece.

Posted 13 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Powerful lyrical write. I love your style.thanks for stopping by.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Magnificent! I see an award badge there and darn well should be! So well crafted that it tickles the tongue when read, and races with the true passion of rant at its finest!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tommy

12 Years Ago

Thank you!
Pretty sure my mind was just blown. I absolutely love the description in this piece I mean you are absolutely relentless! Treasonous non-anonymous hearts spun to extreme, priests preaching for leaches. A very powerful piece with a clear and equally powerful meaning. Great job!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

12 Years Ago

lol I have about 26 right now. I just dig through them as fast as I can and hope that people can be.. read more
Tommy

12 Years Ago

Some people take advantage of the read request, sending five new pieces a day...I'm hard pressed to .. read more
ewest1220

12 Years Ago

Makes sense. I can send you a message but honestly I don't have much on here I've only been on this.. read more
This one hits home for me cause I believe all organized religions are just legalized cults for they all use fear as a tool to guide their flock and not love. Excellent rant.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow Tommy. This blew me away.. Not only was it brilliant, it brought forth excellent imagery throughout.. Chilling descriptive writing.. Bravo!!!



Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Oh oh. Here's an angry man. Strong stuff. Poetically, it is well-constructed and with great word choice. Controlled anger. I like the idea of the poor and the huddled masses being loaned out. The 'poor' is such an interesting concept.
Loaning them out for all sorts of purposes seems a good thing to do, doesn't it?
Maybe I'll borrow some, if only I could think what to do with them.
Well done.
ATB
Alex.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Brilliant! I love
"Treasonous non-anonymous hearts, spun
to extreme; nuns stand at the pulpit, priests
preaching for leaches, as the birds just tweet. "

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Gave me goose bumps - excellent write!

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

If ever there was a more magnificent literary rant, show it to me! Superly created work with a heart speaking conscience. There's a humming in the wings by the untrustworthy.
Apologies, for my mood but seems we're being shafted from people in high places, whether government, faith or certain elements of society - in other words, the so-called power-mongers. ' Who will save us from the lies~of prudence they’ve swayed? ' All those in agreement, please sign your X on the invisible line of hopelessness

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

kewl write Tommy, enjoyed the read

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

2259 Views
32 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 8, 2011
Last Updated on August 24, 2011

Author

Tommy
Tommy

Sandy, UT



About
Veneratio, Amor, et Gratia! Respect, Love, and Gratitude! more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Saxicolous Saxicolous

A Poem by OT