Doomed To Burn

when sleep runs from you and your brain conjures nightmares as if it were your enemy

Doomed To Burn

You struggle to stagger

to stumble through yourself

the winds scream from anguish in your ears

Their cold remarks on your 

left                and right

the bitter cold numbs your skin

and crass your should be

but cold fire burns

and there in the frost and flame

you wish it would sear you 

or at least burn you to dust

and you go on dead inside

almost alive outside

to find one place

one where fires of the hearth

are used tempered instead of hell

Humans a soul forsaken lot

instruments given to sorrow

their voices you follow

smelling wishing to taste sincerity

to banish the drizzling cloud

hanging over you to kingdom come

and they lead you through the fog

and when feet are suspended 

and hands hanging to the cliff edge 

you strain to hear or smell

the sincerity you thought was there

And your burning heart 

falls out from your chest

into the void below

and when your claws break off

and you slip off the edge

the ground in its sarcasm

kisses you coldly

and scatters your disemboweled members

your soul reassembles for still you won't die

and stained in your blood is the snow of the void

shrouded in thick gloom

the air as a prison

What to do but walk

the gloom and its thickness

burn your eyes like

smog endowed with ashes

suddenly your feet are torn open

you cut yourself on scattered pieces

the fossil, porcelain shards

of your porcelain heart

the screams of futility

bounce off the acrylic air

stifled in the carbon of your own cries

all options are taken away

At the sight of your shattered vessel

your body ignites itself inside out

your insides are vomited out as liquid flame

too blind to put your heart back together

too empty to support it in yourself

with nothing left to do

your grip porcelain shard and it blackens in the flame

"maybe" says a voice  "to slit your wrist would end it"

in truth it would be futile

for the pain brings you to life

so doomed you are 

slowly to burn

with no hope of searing or dying

Ignored into nonexistence

     

  

Reviews

[Ian Faraway]

I loved the dark imagery of this piece. Definitely brings about the curse of a dark heart in an even darker world. Some of the sections of the poem didn't make sense to me. Like the wording was off somehow. It did straighten itself out with the lines to follow though. Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed this writing. As I would put it "bitter sweet".

[Deron Alexis]

thanks bro i'm always grateful for a read some criticism and advice
bitter sweet.....i like it lol

[Ian Faraway]

What can I say? I'm good at giving a clusterball of criticism. It's like a hairball but it's a bunch of compliments, insults, bad puns, criticisms, seriousness, and self pity mixed up into one review.

[Ravyne Hawke]

I really enjoyed this dark poem. You have some amazing images and a great flow. I only stumbled once, at the beginning, the first stanza with this line:

and crass your should be

I have no idea what you were trying to say here, but that sentence makes absolutely no sense at all to me. Otherwise, this is a fine poem.

[Deron Alexis]

there's a stage in depression where you feel numb but the numbness is selective and you still feel pretty bad so you should be crass not feeling any thing but there's still a pain there somewhere thanks for reading

[Ravyne Hawke]

then shouldn't it read:

and crass you should be

[Deron Alexis]

you may be right I don't think a paid much attention to vocab in this one O.o

[Deron Alexis]

crass without refinement, delicacy, or sensitivity

[Ravyne Hawke]

I think crass is okay.. it is the "your" that should be changed to "you"

[Deron Alexis]

lol scatter brain didn't realize, my apologies

[Ravyne Hawke]

no worries dear =) I have that scattered brain feeling quite often myself.

[kimmy]

Wow! This was amazing :) I love the flow of this how it tells of pain in the night, well could be day as well. Hanging from the cliff and falling. I have felt these before and it is scary even in my dreams...Very good job on this:)

[Deron Alexis]

lol yeah but i wasn't asleep this wasn't really a dream thanks for reading glad you like it:D