Milton Alamond roast in court

A racist "nut" ,so to speak, commits the ultimate offense, and pays a tasty price.

Milton Alamond had just done what no man was permitted to do in the great state of Loosiplanters. Yes, that's right.... He had just been accused of calling an Almond.... A Peanut N***a. As you've probably gathered this had the nutty peoples of New PistachiOrleans in a huge uproar. There was rioting, beatings, eatings, lootings, and honey roastings. It was truly a scene. I mean, this was worse then Los CashewAngeles back in 92' when Rodney Brazil Nuts was brutally oven roasted and salted for relatively little reason other than a salty snack. The citizens wanted Milton's kernel on a silver platter. So, they had a trial.

Little did Milton know that this wasn't just a court but an oven. He screamed in agony as his kernel darkened to five shades of golden brown. He laughed in delight when they dipped him in honey, and then proceeded to scream again when they salted him with no mercy. All in all it was a grotesque, unusual, delicious trial.

Afterwards, everyone snacked in triumph.

Milton, on the other hand, didn't.

When asked why he was an insensitive peanut profiler Milton had this to say, 'What are you nuts?! All those hardshells look like the guy on the Planter's box!' 'I'm a patriotic Macadamia, and a Neo-Nut.'

He was then quickly escorted to his cell where he would wait for his sentence of death by slow, monotonous chewing.

Reviews

[Adrienne]

You are so creative.
Where does your inspiration come from?
just built in? lol

[Nick]

.......... I can honestly say I have read nothing like this before.... haha

[Steve H]

Amazing! :D
This actually made me LOL, not many things do that :D
I think you need to copywrite the phrase peanut N*gga hahahahaha :D

[AJH]

This made my anus bleed. In a good way.