When some people open their mouths, Vinegar falls from their tongues, Some spit fire and others Prefer to have lips sown shut, Some have all kinds of peculiar things Tumbling forth, Old shoes and dead leaves and a rusty ring
(We call these ones poets)
And some speak in Puffs of semi-transparent smoke. Some talk in mountainous volumes, While only a few's words are worth that size.
You chew on the petals of flowers, Crushing them with your teeth, And spit them out mixed in your words. They stick to my face and reek Like the perfume of a funeral.
But
Underneath the paste of Rose and daisy corpses, Behind the curtain of their stench, You hide hornets. They live beneath your tongue. Suck on their stingers and draw out The venom. Mix it in with your flowery guise.
I cannot tell if others have a thick hide, Or have numbed themselves to the burning, But I feel the poison in agonizing clarity As it rips through my flesh. Your toxins may have blinded some, And they cannot think straightly Amidst the floral stench dominating their senses,
But your poison melts me to the bone, And good luck getting to the marrow, Where soul resides and courage is bred, Good luck breathing through All of those petals that will choke you, Good luck piercing an armor of apathy.
Rip through the silk all you want, But bring bandages for when You cut yourself on the steel.
Exhale flames and pound on your chest. Fling venom in my eyes, I'll fight through the anguish. I'd rather die the last one standing Than surrender myself to a queen who sits On a throne of illusions and Things she has stolen.
Impressed with the way the words flow, love your imagery. reminds me of something I might have written, you have a proud voice about you - in a good way! Proud like wise, not prideful as in snobbish. Sage-like. and soulful.
Your writing is extremely deep, and filled with so much meaning, and soul.
I love that about your work.
Its like you take the readers on a journey.
Another amazing write.
Powerful thoughts and I agree. I don't like negative people or words. You went in many directions in the poem. I like the strong ending to the outstanding poetry. The poem could open the door to a long conversation with many answers. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote
that poem is not worthy of any criticism... Everyone has thier own gifts and yours is writing beautiful poems...
Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”
Posted 9 Years Ago
9 Years Ago
Ahh, every poem is worthy of criticism, dear friend. :)
This poem got intense VERY fast. You have an awesome way with words, and also have quite an imagination. I loved the line good luck piercing an armor of apathy. This is a truly unique piece in my opinion :)
Well, who ever they might be, I am thankful I have not met them. I would just unfriend them if I did. Kathie
Posted 9 Years Ago
9 Years Ago
Unfortunately this delightful woman is someone I know personally. I have the great pleasure of seein.. read moreUnfortunately this delightful woman is someone I know personally. I have the great pleasure of seeing this witch every single day. Sigh
I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity.
I love to write and I love to review. Send me requests and I'll leave you my thoughts. I would hope that you'd do the same for me.
My re.. more..