Abstract

Let the veils cloak us all, 
let the ignorance numb us and dumb us,
let salvation be damned. 

Count your sins as notches in your belt.

The innocents cry softly into the night,
may the whispers carry on into the dark forevermore. 
How could you leave us alone here? 

Warcries echo amongst the clamour of frantic heartbeats. 
We fall to our knees under the ceiling of terror, 
trembling underneath the eyes of our own protectors. 

A chasm yawns beneath our feet, and we reach out
for something to grasp in the endless fog, 
but our fingers sweep over empty ground. 

What was once a perfect illusion is now our very own dagger, 
in our very own hearts. 
We choke on our very own blood.

We fall. We break. 
We blame ourselves.

Author's Note

This poem is one huge, twisting, monster of a metaphor, that I don't even entirely understand myself. I dragged it out of the depths of my mind and I have no idea what this alien is. That being said, I would greatly appreciate your thoughts on it. Any and all critique is welcome.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest and direct words.
"We fall. We break.
We blame ourselves."
Life is simple. After we fall down and try not to repeat the mistakes made. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Dannyisawriter]

Sometimes when we drag stuff out of the depths of our mind that we don't really understand ourselves tend to be the best things lol! Good job on this one

[pdavinci]

Beautiful. That's all I have to say.

[Dutch Jr.]

Yeah this is pretty complex to comprehend. Read it a couple times, got a bit of a picture. Nonetheless, you're a pretty eloquent poet, man. Seriously. Even though I'm not sure what the metaphors are representative of, the images are quite vivid and your word choice is perfect in not only setting the sombre mood, but creating thought provoking images. This is extremely well written.

[Falling Leaf.]

It is all over the place. Just food for thought, mostly. Thanks for reading and your consideration. :)

[rashu]

deep ..that's all i have to say and i am very bad at understanding deep works ..i can write them but understanding ..
huh/..
but i still i try and i did the same i read it 4 times but still i got only some of the lines..
thanks for writing such a peice which made me use my mind:)

[Falling Leaf.]

I am glad you enjoyed it. :)

[willweb]

Wow, this was deep, like something crept out of the underworld of our minds. What we don't know won't hurt us, but what we imagine...

I really enjoyed this today.

[Falling Leaf.]

Thank you. :)

[Dr Ayaz chandio]

this piece is nicely put,i like the metaphoric flow and the message it has...a truth of our-self.

[Falling Leaf.]

Thank you, again. :)