Part Two ~ Carlisle Cullen -- Chapter Two

Chapter twwoo..... YAY! I know its been a long time since I've updated, and for that I'm vERY sorry. But, I hope you enjoy!! =P (its kinda short, though... Sorry...)

 

 

 

   I finally stopped in a field about ten miles from the hospital. My gaze flickered around, looking at the small patch of trees and shrubs that surrounded the clearing. I leaned against one of the nearby oak trees, staring at the sky. I heard a faint rustling in the bushes nearby, and let my eyes slowly travel down to look at it. The rustling continued, and something stepped out.

   The sight in front of me would have knocked the wind out of my lungs if I were human and needed to breathe. Even though I had no real need for oxygen, the air hitched in my throat as I froze. The beautiful ghostly form that stood before me stared straight back, her golden eyes glittering in the faint sunlight that filtered through the trees.

   “Carlisle.” She smiled softly and took a step towards me. My jaw fell open as I tried to speak, but no words escaped.

   “Esme?” I managed to whisper, my eyes widened to the point that they looked as if they were about to pop out of their sockets. “How… How are you here?”

   Esme shrugged, and stopped in front of me.

   “Honestly, I really don’t know. Something to do with will and love and all that stuff, I would assume,” she replied. I marveled at how similar she was now to when she was still alive. Even her voice was the same soft, musical tone it had been before. “But, that doesn’t matter, really. I’m here for a reason.”

   “And what would this reason be?”

   Her perfect face fell.

   “Carlisle, you’ve got to go back. Not just to work at the hospital, but back to your life. You shouldn’t let my death overwhelm you so much; it hurts me to see you suffer like this. Just because my life may be gone doesn’t mean yours has to be,” she explained. My eyebrows furrowed.

   “Yes, it does,” I whispered. “I can’t live without you.”

   “Yes, you can. You have to, Carlisle. I’ve seen how you’ve been lately. You’re just… Lifeless.”

   I didn’t reply to that.

   She was right. I really was lifeless. I could tell by the way the rest always acted around me that I probably depressed them by being this way.

   But, its not like I could really control it. I’m sure if they were in my place they’d act the same way… Right?

   “Please, just try to be better about this. Please, Carlisle. For me,” Esme said quietly. I looked up at her.

   “I’ll try,” I murmured. Esme smiled softly again.

   “Good,” she said. She paused for a second, like she was remembering something. “I love you, Carlisle.” A faint breeze blew through the clearing, taking her form with it. Her whisper twirled in the wind, before it finally disappeared, and left me standing there, completely and utterly alone.

 

   I walked at a slow human pace back to the hospital. I didn’t bother to go back inside, to tell the others where I’d been a those hours that I had been gone. I just walked straight to my car, sliding into the driver’s seat and revving the engine a few times. 

   I avoided any curious eyes and stares as I came back into the house. The usual light and airy atmosphere of the home seemed different now, hopefully not because of my presence. As if reading my mind, Edward took a few steps toward me.

   Wait, reading my mind… Oh, right.

   “Carlisle, are you okay?” he asked quietly, his eyes concerned. I stifled a sigh.

   “Yes, Edward. I’m fine,” I replied, quietly. Edward didn’t seem to buy it.

   “No, you’re not. I know what happened, Carlisle.” He sighed, not removing his gaze from me. I refused to let my eyes meet his, afraid it would betray my words if he saw the obvious pain they were filled with.

   “Edward, why does it matter?” I asked, glancing at him out of the corner of my eye.

   “Because, Carlisle, you’re… You’re just so… Depressed.”

   My eyes quickly snapped up to stare him in the eye. My muscles tensed as my eyebrows furrowed together.

   “Oh, really? I would’ve never noticed,” I nearly hissed, sarcastically. “Did you really expect that I would just get over this easily, Edward? Actually, I can’t even guarantee that I’ll get over it at all. You don’t understand how this feels; not at all. Yes, I know you have gone through some hard times with Bella, but she didn’t kill herself, did she? Well, Esme did! None of you will ever understand,” I finished, nearly trembling. Through all of that, Edward kept a straight face. How he did that, I don’t know. I never could.

   “Carlisle, you aren’t the only one that cared for Esme,” he said, his voice almost a dry monotone.

   “I realize that –,” I started to say, before Edward held up a hand, palm forward, stopping me in mid sentence.

   “She also wasn’t the only one who cared for you.” He paused for a moment. “Just because she’s gone doesn’t mean that there’s no one else who doesn’t care about you, Carlisle. We all love you. You’re more important to this family than you seem to think.”

   “I guess,” I muttered, dropping my gaze. “You know, I… Just… Forget it.” I shook my head, turning to go up the stairs.

   Well, I suppose upstairs is my refuge now. The others would catch on to that soon enough. I just sat on the floor of my office, leaning my head against the wall. I heard someone come in downstairs; Alice.

   “I saw what happened. Is Carlisle okay?” I heard her ask. A moment passed before Edward responded.

   “I’m not sure. I’ve never seen him like that. In fact, I don’t think any of us have,” he said.

   “Well, what can we do? He can’t go through the rest of his life like that. And, by the rest of his life, I mean forever.”

   “Don’t know. Is there really anything we can do?” Edward asked. Alice hesitated.

   “Maybe we could find him someone new?” she suggested.

   “Possible. But, Alice, you know Carlisle. I don’t think he’d go along with that too easily,” Edward replied. He was right; I wouldn’t go along with that. There was no way they could get me to find someone else; I’ll always love Esme. Always have, and always will. And they know that I still love her.

   With every little piece of my broken, shattered heart.

Author's Note

Well, sorry that its kinda short. But, you know, the usual. Ignore my typos (I did my best to edit most of them out though). I hope you all liked it!!

Reviews

[Zippy]

AWSOME!! haha i got hinking..if u really anted to you could add yourself in to this!