Sleep

I tell myself to wake up, not break up,

Delusional muck plip-plop-plopping down my spine

Infiltrating the best of me with prejudices

Jealousy

Fear

And indifference

Is it indifference if I still care?

Even if the mountain of the affection I had before

Has been replaced with a puddle of amusement and tolerance?

Sleep has become cruel – will I always wake indifferent?

Colder than the days before?

Harshest irony it is, then, that the antidote for this attitude

Doubles as the bestower of it.

Doubly damned, for I feel trapped within this inner solitude,

Smashed against the parallel walls of honesty with myself

And care for the one who loves me.

Hopefully, tomorrow I’ll wake up in love again.

For today, my care is all I can promise you.

Accept my lack of constancy as symptomatic of a great

Fear, of your love and life in general.