What You've Lost

 

I was the warm breeze that touched your face

when you walked outside on the first day of Spring.

I was the shining light of the stars

brightening your night as you walked around.

I was the sparkling reflection off the snow

that fell yesterday as you lay sleeping.

The sunlight falling through the trees,

its beams gently illuminating the ground.

I leave you now.

 

All you’ll have left are

grey clouds…

still air…

fog…

no light…

 

Nothing will be left for you,

for nothing’s all you left for me.

Reviews

[~crazy Beautiful~]

wow beautiful and tragic
i loved the first part, I could feel the words as I read them.
might I suggest the changeover from what you were ,to what you are no longer, be as descriptive as the first part ,with that emotion.
I feel that this is quite good as it stands, but on expansion could be unbelievable

[Nicholas Hallows]

This is very powerful. I love images of nature and the way the structure also represents 'what you've lost'... full and rich in the first stanza becoming barren and bleak.
NH