Untitled

Everyday I am counting, constantly counting down. 

I tried counting up but big numbers tend to swallow me.

Just like my weight.

I almost agreed to happiness, but the depression still hugs my side like a blanket. 

I thought i could just rip it away, it just left me exposed to the cold.

Anxiety took hold and is not letting go.

I bought clothes that I thought would make me better.

Instead it switched to just sadness because I was a fake. 

I am not meant for this life.