Testing

I sighed. He called me to his house. I finally decided. I am not going to go. I won't let him control me like that anymore. I love him so much though. I gasp, trying to control my tears. It would hurt so much to let go of him but he kept getting angry after he told me he wouldn't. And he was probably disgusted with me.

The pain spread in me again. The evil monster lurking in all my veins. It wouldn't come out. It stayed there and bit at me from the inside. I gasped again. I need my razor. I went to the bathroom and took the razor. I sliced my arm once where I had sliced it before. Blood leaked out; take a bit of the monster with it. I sighed, relief washed over me. I felt so whole. As I was about to make the second cut when my phone rang. I picked it up.

"Hello?" I said softly.

"If you don't come I'll tell everyone about your cuts."

"Well, I'll tell everyone you hit me."

"No one will believe you!"

"Yes they will! I have the bruises to prove it."

"If you do that, I'll kill myself." He said his voice going from anger to sorrow.

My heart ached to hear his voice so sad. I gripped my chest forcing myself to breathe out. It was getting harder and harder.

"Don't," I murmured.

"Don't what?" He asked his voice still so sad.

"Don't kill yourself," I cried.

"I won't if you come here." He bargained.

"I'll come." I said.

I took my bag and took out my hoodie that I stuffed into it.

As I took it out a pregnancy test fell out. I sighed. I had thrown up at lunch today because I was feeling bad. Anna had given me a test saying that I might be pregnant. There was no way I could be; I mean Jared, thankfully, uses protections. I put it back in my bag and threw on my hoodie and rushed to Jared's house.

I reached his house in time to see him coming out the door, drunk.

"Jared?" I said coming closer to him.

He collapsed into my arms and started crying.

"Jared? Are you okay? Let's get you inside." I said trying to avoid a scene with the neighbours.

I got him inside and settled into his couch. His Mom was still out. She always worked and he didn't have any siblings.

"What is it Jared?" I asked again.

"I'm sorry. Don't leave me. It wasn't my fault." he shouted.

"What wasn't your fault?" I asked confused.

"You blame me for cutting yourself. You think it was because of me that you cut yourself! Because I cheated on you!" He cried his voice like that of a child.

"Jared! I don't blame you! I will never blame you! It was my own fault! It has nothing to do with you." I stammered.

"Promise?" he said looking at me like a child who was just promised a big toy on Christmas.

"Promise." I reassured him and held him close to me.

"I love you Laura. Don't forget that." He said kissing me.

We started kissing and one thing led to another as always.

***********************************************

I came back from Jared's house around midnight. As I entered the door I was greeted by my dad.

"Where were you?" he demanded.

"Sorry dad. Something came up. I was at Jared's house." I said trying to act all innocent.

"You could have left a message." He said.

"I did! I left one on the fridge." I said showing him the message I had actually remembered to leave.

"What was the big emergency?" He asked his anger going down.

"Well... Jared has some problems with his mom and uh... they just had a really big fight. And I wanted to support him because you raised me to help my friend, right?" I said twisting words around.

Dad sighed.

"You're right honey. But remember, sometimes you have to let a person deal with things by themselves." he said kissing the top of my head and going upstairs.

I went upstairs and took a shower. After I had finished and it was around one, I went back to my room. I saw the pregnancy test still in my bag. I sighed; it would still be on my mind until I used it.

I went to the washroom, read the instructions and did it.

I looked at the instructions on how to tell if it was positive or negative.

I looked at the test. It was...