I love this! Every day I walk through Chicago and see so many people on the sidewalk with their eyes open, but who aren't seeing anything! We all need to notice, to see -- but sometimes it's hard to know what is safe or smart to do to act on what we see. On a structural note, I like how the first few stanzas have the repetition "Do not, do not" and how the next few have "They [did], they [did]" -- the repetition creates a mantra with a lot of power. To capitalize on that power of repetition, I would suggest maybe having the last group of stanzas all start with the same word/phrase/idea: "If" or "Should" feel like good fits.
Reminds of me modern and ancient morals...both, have their place, delicately woven, so much so, the soul can walk through life and hope to see it's hope and faith walk before it xx
Should your blood spill,
it will flow in rivers of generations,
and should you come thru unscathed,
your testimony will walk before you.
Above all else, son,
when you grow up
be something that matters.
An excellent write from my favorite poet after( Sarath Ramavarma, he is another poet ), so deep, fabulous footing on reality and most relevant in day to day struggle of this generation more than in the past I may say, best remedy to not to throw yourself int o an innocent victim or depressed candidate, every thing is perfect, I may say intensity of this strategy should be tuned to the situation when it comes to practical level, at times in the absence of extra cushion of support system and also considering the fact how it affects the souls you care pressurized to tune for you, last few lines the best ones I may say,really powerful writing enjoyed fully
Posted 10 Years Ago
10 Years Ago
Linda, you're too too kind. Thank you so much for your comments...
Having lived through the 60s I remember the days of the fire hoses and the dogs. Cross burning and idiotic behavior. Bigotry is always a sad step backward in our world. Welcome to enlightenment
Posted 10 Years Ago
10 Years Ago
Thank you so much Tate. I had been watching a documentary on JFK
Very good! I am impressed! This is just the sort of thing that I write for! Advice is hard thing to follow but then once you experience it, it makes perfect sens2!
Posted 10 Years Ago
10 Years Ago
Thank you LadyAnne, but only if it's good advice and that's only realized after it's followed. Good .. read moreThank you LadyAnne, but only if it's good advice and that's only realized after it's followed. Good judgement comes from bad experience, and most of that comes from bad judgement.
"A poet's work is to name the unnameable, to point at frauds, to take sides, start arguments, shape the world, and stop it going to sleep."
-Salman Rushdie more..