i was leaving hollow echoes

i was leaving hollow echoes in the streets of a poem you wrote

of burdens from worn brogues in rhymes that burn like cheap whisky

in my throat failing to ever cease the effects your poetry connotes

and your surreal urban scene descended like a dream all around me

your characters were as threaded as seams from an overlock machine

and i witnessed them carving out whispers over their collars and cuffs

back behind the old laundromat huddled over barrels, urban fire gleam

and the smoke strung out in curls before it rose and dissipated its tufts

i had to stop walking - take time to perceive what did your words mean

their faces were no longer just blurs hidden behind panes of clouded glass 

no, now they were as familiar as yesterday's news and no longer a dream

i felt stoned and feared to be hallucinating out of a trip from the past

but alas here i was - i could feel my furrowed face being searched by my hands

looking for a time before you penned these worried letters to my mind

in acquisition i created a search to find myself in a way i was certain to understand

but instead arrested your poems now searching restitution for their crime

and wondering if i would ever meet you this side of the gas works wall

or would our spirits never traverse beyond our eloquent terms teasing

and the screams that navigate the alleys of my mind be barely susurration

unless i concede and unravel the threads of our time never ceasing

Reviews

[Linda alexander]

your characters were as threaded as seams from an overlock machine
and i witnessed them carving out whispers over their collars and cuffs
back behind the old laundromat huddled over barrels, urban fire gleam
and the smoke strung out in curls before it rose and dissipated its tufts

Poet came across some episode or another situation or another poem relating to his own past, which made the characters match like seams of an over locking machine, the characters in the poem started
delivering more unpleasant images like curls of smoke from laundromat machine prior it dsisipiates in to thin air as heavy tuft of smoke, and the memories which were buried for good became alive, so poor poet tried to stop those messages and trying to repair the damage they did to him, wants to see these message prior to the sad event, now the painful memories bombarding in his mind continuously, poet wish to make the mind to beleiive so that unravel the time as if the tragedy never happened, other wise he has to continue to suffer with these painful memories and screams in mind, great write, so close to reality, pain as an un welcomed guest came to poets mind is beautifully potrayed

[m.s.early]

(: thank you for this deeply interpretative review :)

[Linda alexander]

Thank you very much, my pleasure, take care

[Lyn Anderson]

I wonder, slick fellow, how many women here wonder if this is about her ...

[m.s.early]

it wouldn't be too slick of me to reveal that number lol

[Lyn Anderson]

Ha ha and that is a very slick answer indeed :)