Sayonara

You've build up dreams under the starry night sky until farewell comes.

Together

Two hands intertwined.

Hearts beating in one rhythm

Under the starry night sky.

Smile

A shade of pink brushing those pallid cheeks;

Walking along the honey-colored lane

With the gentle wind caressing their skin.

Laugh

Promises borne from the blue stars above;

From afar, a lone comet disappears

Together with it were silent wishes and prayers.

Fading

All of it seemed distant dreams;

Melting into the light of day

A faint voice whispering, "Sayonara."

-TheMalady

Author's Note

Hi! I just wanted to write down something about today. This one's a bit melancholic. Any feed backs? Anyone who can relate to this one? I'd be very happy for any thoughts. :)

Reviews

[BThomvanWart]

To be honest, being an anime nerd, I can't help but picture this in the ways many anime portray similar situations! I liked this piece; it's adorable and honest. We all dream and make dreams with others, but sometimes those dreams don't reach fulfillment because a good-bye had happened. Distance is funny, it's the one thing that can take a dream that's been carefully crafted and cause it to become unraveled. Nice work, Mal!

[TheMalady]

Thanks a lot, BThomvanWart! I'm glad that it left that kind of impression to you. I really appreciate your time for reading this work and yes! This is indeed inspired from my years of watching anime and reading manga. haha :D

[BThomvanWart]

That's awesome! I love it that much more! Haha. You're welcome! I'm glad I could stop by and check out your work~

[TheMalady]

Thanks a lot! I'll stop by to yours and check your awesome write-ups as well! :)

[Carolynn]

I like the way you put this poem together with the first word leaving an impact as the relationship changes from beginning to end. It's a very relatable subject as most people go through failed relationships at least once in their lives - well done! :)

[Lavorther]

A beautiful poem, I loved how every stanza started with just one word. It flowed really well too.

[TheMalady]

Thanks a lot, Lavorther! Thanks for the time you took to read this. I'm happy that you loved this. :)

[Gregory Stires]

this poem of yours is very good. i like how each stanza was spaced to allow the build up of emotion from on line to the other. i can relate to having to say good bye to people such as my mother, and my friends in my sophmore year of high school when they all ended up moving away and ironically i moved away the year after. i still talk to them but its not the same as when we all just used to hang out. overall i think this poem is very good and that its not to long not to short and relays the feelings your feeling in a medium length poem without it seeming like their should be more.

[TheMalady]

Thanks a lot, Gregory! I'm glad that you liked this poem and your review is very appreciated. Thanks for the kind words. That is true, it will never be the same again, and even though you still communicate, the feeling just changed, unlike when you were always together. :)

[Leran Vakem]

If I can describe this poem in one word it would be WOW.
It was cleverly written and it just runs of your tongue. I enjoyed reading it.

L.V.

[TheMalady]

Thanks a lot, L.K! I'm glad that it m go WOW, haha. Thanks again! You really inspire me to write. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked the poem. I liked the way you set-up the poem leading to strong ending. I like the use of the one word and how you defined the word. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Bethsinitaly]

The magic of a moment suspended in time where reality can't tarnish it's memory. I especially liked the imagery of 'promises borne from the blue stars above'

[TheMalady]

Thanks a lot for reading! I'm glad that you like it. Your words will be a big encouragement for me :)

[Celie Rose]

Beautifully expressed poem. Choice of words are amazing. Captures the readers attention. Warm and inviting. Each stanza represents itself. Well written. Keep up the good work.

[TheMalady]

Thanks a lot, Celie Rose. I'm very happy for the praises that you've given. Your time spent to read this inspires me a lot. Thanks a lot! :)

[Krizito]

You've got an arsenal of beautiful words...and you sure have no qualms about firing..Bravo!!!
"Sayonara"...what does it mean? I'm guessing something to do with goodbye."GOODBYE"_the saddest word of them all...

[TheMalady]

Aw, yeah! That is so true >_< And it's the saddest word in this poem.
Your words flatter me to no end that I might suffer a serious hydrocephalus(okay, I think I'm exaggerating) Anyway, thanks a lot. Your words encourage me to go on writing. Thanks a lot for reading! I totally appreciate it. :)

[Krizito]

The pleasure was all mine.
Now care to expantiate on HYDROCEPHALUS? It got my head spinning in circles.

[TheMalady]

haha, it's a condition wherein a kid's head enlarges due to the accumulation of fluid. Nah, it's just a joke. haha, sorry to make your head spin.

[Krizito]

No fuss over it...the spinning's over.

[TheMalady]

haha, okay, that's great. :)

[Archos]

Beautiful poem. It made me very cozy and my heart almost melted :) Suggesting works really well in this poem and tells more than saying outright possibly could. Thanks for sharing!

[TheMalady]

You're very welcome, Archos! And i'm glad that you like this poem! I'm glad that this made you cozy and your heart warmed up. Thanks again. :)