The Snow Queen

I'm naked
But you're a mist
So they can't see
And you surround me.

I'm dripping
I'm cold.
It's winter.
But I'm wet.
Still, you're a mist.
So they can't see
How you choke me.

These are simple words, right?

I laugh dryly.
It's carried by icy vapor.
To the others, I exist as but a sound.

I go to them in nightmares.
As a soft whisper.
They say I'm their dream girl-
A damsel in distress.

They write poetry in my name.

FOOLS!

What good will that do me?

I'm trapped here in eternal pain.

Free me.

I am your fantasy. Or so you think.

Tell me, if you love me so much,
Why did you never bother
Looking for me in reality?

What's this fine line between us?
Can lovers never meet?

I am your goddess.
I command you to free me!
I BEG you to free me.

But you can't hear me, can you?

You can. But you refuse to believe it.
I'm just the whispering wind.
And my form is just a blizzard.

But I'll be taking you with me.

Reviews

[pinhead07]

This is really nice. Really liked it. So many layers to it too. Love, the hopelessness of it, how it tears one away, emotional turmoil, how it's all around, like air, but you can't touch it, which drives one insane, in the end, the force of it but like a goddess. Beckoning. Yet you go to it, it takes you with it... :p

[Leigh]

I get an amazing feeling from this, your words seem to be semi-hypnotic, this is a very absorbing write

[Blue Ivory]

Thank you! ^_^

[Lily Mae]

This rocks it out.. omg.. I so love the creativity and original flare that is all you.. :) Damn girl..you've got it.. your blizzard is on fire.. :D xo

[Blue Ivory]

Lol thanks :D Made my day

[Amandaaa Caroline (:]

This is so creative.. And wow, you really pull the reader in, make them feel the emotion that you're trying to portray.. Then at the end it becomes more powerful, more demanding of attention.. I agree with others, this whole thing has a bit of an eerie feel to it, but it's beautiful. Well done (:

[Blue Ivory]

Awwww thanks so much!

[Amandaaa Caroline (:]

No problem (:

[MOON]

Love how you draw the reader in and describe the snow queen so well, icy lady yet full of mystery and charm. Lovely haunting write.

[Blue Ivory]

Thank you :)

[SHEEMA HUQ]

Hi siren, I can imagine the Snow Queen, with velvet gloved hands in an ice-capped horse driven carriage, travelling through a terrain of hail and snow, reciting this regally through a tormenting blizzard.....I was quite compelled. Well done.

[Blue Ivory]

It means a lot that you liked it :)

[UnderCompulsion]

I LOVE this!It is so magical,the words are still haunting me.It is dark,and it shows the coldness that this women have.I have a picture of her in my mind and that only shows how powerfull is your poem .Great work as always. :)

[Blue Ivory]

Awww thank you! :3

[luviva]

ok...
the snow queen is real authorative and commanding!!
do i like her?? absolutely well written my friend.
the flow, structure, word choice and carefree tone like she has got us all in her grip.
loved it 1000%

[Blue Ivory]

Yay! ^_^ Thank you!

[Coyote Poetry]

A beautiful and haunting poem. I like the desire and the hunger to be seen and felt. You create a very interesting situation. A Snow Queen could be bad or good? I like the complete story. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[Blue Ivory]

Thank you :)

[Ana Drake]

Wow. No lie, I just read the three damn times!
I am amazed, wonderful work.
You've given me such a vivid picture, so alive, that I felt a chill myself.
Tonight, I will draw this woman. Then send you an email when I'm finish.
Thankx for the R.R. Great write.

[Blue Ivory]

Wow. Lol I get that feeling reading other people's work, but I never even imagined someone feeling that way about something that I wrote! Send me the picture, please. I'll edit this poem and put it here. i wanted to add a picture to the poem, but nothing I search for feels, well made for me, so it'd be very useful to me.

[Ana Drake]

I've already started :P
I'll send you an email once it's finished. I have the same problem when posting my work, sometimes I spend hours on Google images trying to find the right pic. :)

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

I can picture a seducitve and powerful woman. She is an entity that longs to be human but she is not human completely only half. I see her pleading in one breath to be free but then it is as if she gives and evil claiming what she will do.....well written

[Blue Ivory]

Thank you, I'm glad I could portray the image in my head to you!