Gabrial

I am a dreamer of a man.
I’m esoteric, compelling and vain.
I carry alchemy in my hands
and bane scarlet veneer in my veins,
silver tainted illusions at the tip of my wings
and a nostalgic beating at my core.
Its cadence is one of a king’s
but it’s fragile and forged as yours.
I take your mortal heart in mine
and turn its brittle pages one by one.
I pick out the most sublime lines
and leave them to burn in the sun.
My whisper as wind to a feather
can order a world to its grave.
My touch; pure as spring’s first heather
can calm the sea’s wildest waves
and alter the blush of your face
and tear up the form of your grace.

I am a hellion of a man.
My charm is made of fabricated lies.
There’s crumbled ground where I stand
and bane scarlet demise in my eyes,
deceptive silver illusions at the tip of my wings
and an arduous truth in my soul.
Scripture will talk of the ruin I bring
with these abilities I fail to control.

I am an angel of a man
whose sins have caused storms of blood.
Fact isn’t what I am.
What you see are ephemeral floods
and stone cold, ghostly, crushing loss.
Shadows moving over trampled bones
and the massacre we look across.
The bane scarlet tinctured stones
the cobbles of the unknown.
I am an angel of a man
who surrenders sin for peace of mind.
I am an angel of a man
and those I love have fallen too.
Created in an image,
created by almighty design.

Hell is here when I open my eyes.
They can see too far and too wide;
details which torture my mind.
So look me straight in the lies
and watch this Angel Fall from the sky. 

Reviews

[spiritwind]

Who are you?
You're no tyro wandered into this group to play with words.
I have read you before and thought you quite good
but I never saw THIS coming.
Words fail me
but I want to see you published
and I will not be still until you get published
so that more than the people here in this cafe can read you.
A perfect rating--what else could I do?

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you so much for this incredible review!! It means the world to me.

[Rana]

Powerful ballad, with words chosen with much care they hit home every other line, the phonetics in place so you read it out loud and feel the story beyond the literal meaning, and quite intimately connected with everyone's being, the metaphors are good. You can see that a writer speaks for the masses. Beautiful composition.

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you :)

[Wondering Mind]

Deep, with profound imagery.
I can quote many expressions I enjoyed, but that would probably mean copying and pasting a lot.
I liked the play on the name ..clever twist

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you very much

[John Alexander McFadyen]

The title threw me a little as Gabriel is the protector of Israel and the conveyor of prophesies. The fallen angel was Lucifer although he started out as the bringer of light. That aside I was captivated by this honest expose of a poet's heart laid bare upon the parchment of self doubt.

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you.

'Gabrial' in itself is fictional but a play on and representation indeed of the famous and good 'Gabriel'- we can be close to idea of goodness and portrayed as such but all have the ability to fall or be evil perhaps.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I think that is a dilemma that faces the artist and in particular the poet. We are complex creatures with more than one dimension.

[TheJordBaker]

Most definitely, and I think how naturally this came to me all those years ago is why I still favour this piece. It is me- the poet- the dreamer- the man- written on a page.

[Fairy Khan]

I love the vivid imagery in this one. Nicely penned. Kudos to you. :)

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you very much :)

[Chris Shaw]

A class write here TheJordBaker. Pleased to have found this gem. A wonderfully creative write about the fallen angel, with bits of you woven into the fabric as well for added measure. So expressively conveyed. Excellent work.

Chris

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you Chris, I really appreciate you reviewing this piece as it holds a lot of meaning even 6 years later.
Glad you enjoyed it.

[Chris Shaw]

That makes it all the more special that it is getting an airing again, and it deserves to.

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you :)

[Dexter-black]

Really good sis. Real good.

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you :)

[lightsong]

as You told me in Your review, Your title also dragged me to Your poem, then comes Your opening lines, they sailed to my core and with no doubt I knew that You put so much of Your essence in this write, a truly amazing piece, the simple language with Your superb expressions, between the lines here and there stand a thought, I loved that You made Archangel Gabrial flows also with a humanistic essence, at some points it's about You not Him, speaking of Your spiritual energy.

Perfect write my friend, well done.

[TheJordBaker]

Thank you so much

[Mia]

I returned for another read…still as incredible(which doesn't do it justice) as the first time!

[TheJordBaker]

You really are too kind :D thanks Mia.