House

A Poem by Isaiah Dunn

Have you ever felt like a stranger in your own house?

I’ve been feeling like a stranger in my own house.
My brain got lost trying to escape my doubts.
Pushing away the people I can’t live without.
Why the f**k can I not recognize myself in my own house.

My family’s been watching me carefully. Because the pain that I hide is getting way too easy to see.
My destructive tendencies push people away. Even though I want them to stay.

And no I don’t need to be saved but if you got something to take I could really use something to ease all of this pain.

The only reason I’m alive is for family and friends. Even though deep down I just want all of this bullshit to end.

Can I be saved?

Can I be redeemed?

Will I ever love myself enough to let someone else do the same for me?

Or am I just trapped in this labyrinth of pain that I, unfortunately, have to call my brain.

I don’t need help I’ll do it by myself.

I’ll keep stacking up these liquor bottles like a pyramid to pray to myself.
Because I’m pretty sure there’s no god and tragically that means all I have is me.

I feel like I’m going insane but there is one thing that never seems to change.

I’ve been feeling like a stranger in my own house.
Can't really recognize the ones I thought I couldn’t live without.
My brain is doing laps trying to escape the doubt.
Why the f**k can I not recognize myself in my own house.