Monologues with Dogs Part Two

Part Four of Tales from the Alternate Universe

Sometimes my humans can be so dumb. I just don’t get it. How is it that they don’t understand the simple rules of this game? I’ve been trying to show them for the last ten rounds, but it’s like their brains are incapable of processing the basic steps.

I just want to scream out at them and say, “You throw the stick. I chase after it, grab it, then do either six, eight, or eleven complete circles at random. Then I decide whether I’m going to bring it back or not. If I don’t, you are required by the rules to come chase me down to get it from me.

I can’t make it any clearer to them. But they just don’t get it, and that annoys the s**t out of me.

You know what else pisses me off? How is it with all these scientific advancements going on in the world, they still haven’t figured out a way to translate our language into their own yet?