Final Test

 Here I lie at closing rest.
Unshaken faith at final test.
 
In velvet bed I lie in state.
I drift above, I watch and wait.
 
Loved ones weeping as they pass.
But will you come at long, long last?
 
They sign the book and pay respects
Say thier prayers and share regrets.
 
Daylight lingers on no more.
But there I wait, eyes on the door.
 
Oh heartless Fate, can she not see
How this sad end is searing me?
 
I only wanted one last kiss
Just to know that I'd be missed.
 
Fate, she sadly looks at me.
It's time to go ... Eternity!
 
In final test, my life sufficed
I have my place in "Paradise".
 
But "Paradise" without you love?
A final joke from God above?
 
With trumpet blast I pass the gates
As Heaven's Choir celebrates.
 
Angels sing and shower praise
Suddenly my spirits raise.
 
Over songs of joy sung loud.
A heartbeat's heard within crowd.
 
Dear God, has heard my every prayer
As I draw close I see you there.

 

 

 

 

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Author's Note

Added a VoiceRead on 2/9/09

Reviews

[Sandra Cooper]

I have to agree with Katrina- Enjoyed the pictures this painted and how you wrote from the deceased's eyes- waiting for his long lost love...and I loved how they were reunited in Paradise- what we hope for, since facing the unknown and being there for eternity is too lonely a thought-
Well written Jerry,
Peace
San

[Emily B]

Oh, wow!

In my mother-in-laws last days she said her goodbyes. We watched her fade away until we thought it must be the end. We heard her mumble, 'well if he's not there I'm not coming." Her eyes opened and she was very much back with us.

[Althea Tremaine]

Wow. This is intense. Great job.

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

Beautiful.. the thought of love everlasting, so beautiful..

Chloe
xoxo

[Conrad Wrobel]

O wow, I really felt this piece. It flows so beautifully, it just rolls off the tongue.
"Oh heartless Fate, can she not see,
How this sad end is searing me."
XD
I love that it is the internal dialog of someone who is dead. It really is so sweet, and the ending is just perfect. What a great piece!

[Angie- Reading As Fast ..]

This is a beautiful piece of work. An amazingly smooth flow with great description. It's sad, but I love the work.

[T]

What a sad and beautiful poem....stirring the heart of the reader....

[Jasmina Amethyst Pendra..]

only wanted one last kiss,
Just to know that I was missed.

Fate, she sadly looks at me.
It's time to go ... Eternity!

I started crying right here. This was so beautiful and haunting. I know what it is like to lose someone but never have i thought what it might be like for them... if anything at all. This was wonderful. Thank you for making me think. ~Liv

[Debra Stevens Edwards (..]

An amazing testimony of love and faith. As always your words have touched the soul of me and
we share a common thread. We both believe that there is but one true love in our lives. I had begun to think I was the only one that felt that way. Thank you for sharing. In the last line of the 3rd stanza, it should be "Say Their Prayers" well take care.
Debby

[Frances Lennon]

Absolutely beautiful! I just love this one Jerry. I particularly like the lines `but `paradise` without you love? A final joke from God above? Just brilliant!
Frances.

[J. Ackson Jr.]

Good write indeed. The entire poem was great. Makes me think of two lovers who died in a car crash or something to that extent.

"But "Paradise" without you love?
A final joke from God above?"
those are my favorite lines =)