The Clockwork Cat

A tribute to my own cat, who reached 20 years before her gears stopped turning. RIP Piewackett.

The shrill, metallic cry at dawn -
A long beseeching moan, forlorn;
Its jarring timbre splits the air
And bids me rise to meet it there.

I stumble blindly down the hall,
Led by that ghastly, ghostlike call,
And there in darkness, lamplights glow,
My clockwork cat bids me hello.

The scream fades to a whirring sound -
A pleasant drone once I’m around
To change the oil and turn the key;
I wind her up, as she winds me.

This cat was once of wholesome flesh,
Not gears and pistons, wires and mesh
With rusted frame and broken tail;
Her movement brittle, weak and frail.

Where every jolting jerk and judder
Makes her weary innards shudder;
Taking all her life to die,
To fossilize and petrify.

“Oh clockwork cat” we often say,
“Oh, should we wind you up today?
When every turning of the key
Prolongs your body’s atrophy?”

But clockwork cat, she lingers still,
And clockwork climbs her clockwork hill,
Like clockwork, we still wind her on,
Till clockwork cat is finally gone.

Reviews

[Chloe_Spence]

Wow, I must say... the rhyme in this is enticing... I like the structure of this poem- everything flows smoothly :) Well done :)

[frivolous treasures]

Wow. This left me utterly speechless (and in this case, writing-less, but I shall try!!)
This was very well penned, I loved the meter and rhyming. It was a smooth read.
The repitition of the word 'clockwork' in the last stanza definitely swung the message home.
You certainly have a beautiful way with words! Maika'i no and chi pono!!

[The Lark]

Thank you kindly :)

[frivolous treasures]

Your most welcome :)

[*]

An excellent job.

[charmedbyitall]

You are Apollo's plaything. Enough said.

[Lorraine]

Before anything else, just wanna say I never knew cats live up to 20 years, that in itself is wonderful. Anyways, on with the poem. First, I like the title. It wasn't written with such intricate words, but it works nonetheless and it's a rather unique one that perks interest. Second, I like the rhyming scheme. Oh geez, I know just how hard it is to write something that rhymes and makes sense both at the same time--or maybe it's just me. Third, it's meaningful. I don't even have to explain this part, it just is. Anyways, good job.

Keep Writing. ^__^

[Samuel Dickens]

Very enjoyable read. I much prefer old-fashioned style poetry such as this, and you've crafted it with great skill. Twenty years, huh? Now, that's an old cat!

[Bee]

Man! That was good. The perfect rhyming was just a plus. I like the concept here, saying how we're all like the clockwork cat, working and working but don't really know the true meaning of what we do... I mean we live everyday for what, precisely? What the importance of having money and riches anyway when we'll all, in the end, wither up and leave everything behind... 0_o Like, to us everything is a routine... but looking at we do everyday, what is the sense of it all, right? It's soo cool that you have a 20 year old cat, that just adds more coolness factor to your poem.

[Lilly]

A beautiful piece in every way! Lovely form, rhyme and imagery.
Nice little story too.
I enjoyed this.

[Austin]

Good word choice, rhyme, repetition, and all the other words that describe what you did. It's quite impressive. I'm still a newbie at poetry, so now I have someone to look up to in the poetic world. Thank you for sharing this piece with the world. It was entertaining and sad. Like Marley and Me. Good work.

[wolfshrew]

What a great talent you possess, your word choice and they way you
put it together was flawless in this piece of writing. It was very enjoyable.