I'm tired

Basically don't know what to do anymore I feel so alone even when I'm in a room full of people, but I'm gonna keep trying

I say I'm just tired all the time but in reality I'm tired of everything, not as in sleepy but, I'm Mentally. Physically. Emotionally drained. Nobody knows what I go through. And when I say nobody I mean nobody, not even the people I consider my sisters. That's because I know they have their own problems to worry about and I don't want to pile up onto their problems. I mean yeah I leave little hints and small explanations and break down occasionally about what's going on, but that's not even half the story, so much happens in my life and people have no idea what I go through. Everybody thinks I'm happy all the time and just a little problems here and there but that's not the case at all. I'm at the point In my life where I started not giving a f**k about anything. And continue to make wrong decisions that I'm well aware of, but i don't care because I feel like I have no reason to care anymore. I know making the choices I'm making are gonna affect me in the long run and that sucks because I don't know what else to do or where else to turn to. Very recently everything suddenly hit me, like that. It kills me, and I swear I just wanna give up and run away from everything but I learned that you can't run away from your problems because they follow you everywhere you go and you carry some sort of burden on your back till you do something about it. So I'm going to do everything i can to keep holding on and not give up no matter how much I want to because I know that when something bad happens it's not the end it's the beginning getting you prepared for something good.