Full Circle

Chapter 5

Alright. Wow. I cannot believe everything that has happened really happened. It is so hard for me to remember.... It's been almost four months since the last entry here. Let's just pick up from where we left off. It would have been better to write this sooner so that I could give an honest representation of how things went down. But seeing as they already have, let's see what my scattered brains and biased opinion have to say.....

In August school started back up. I got to see her again. We got to talk a little more, but not much more seeing as I texted her at that point 90% of my days. I got to see her more often and things were pretty great. But only to begin with. Things started changing in my mind. They started happening. I started seeing differently..... clearer, if you would. She was a b***h, and she had me whipped like a dog, with a wool as thick as the ocean wrapped around my eyes. I have no doubt in my mind that she loved me. None at all. But..... the way she loved me wasn't exactly right sometimes.

She complained about EVERYTHING. I listened to every bit, because I thought that is what a good boyfriend should do. I wasn't wrong, but it WAS wrong for me to be treated in such a way.I shall not tell of how badly I was treated. Maybe another time. But things grew strenuous and strained between us. The gasoline behind it all was her.

She asked me for a "break," as she called it. She wanted time to get her s**t together. She had done it once before, but it was the right thing to do at that time. This time....... it wasn't. It was bad timing altogether. I was already starting to question her and myself, and our relationship. I told my sister about it, and her and her boyfriend both sat and talked to me about what she was doing. Didn't do much good, if not bad.In the end, I decided to wait her out. After all, it wasn't THE end, just a break. She told me she was ready to get back together. I, not having a reason to back out, and still believing I could make something of this shattered relationship, took her back.My sister despised my choice, but I wanted to see this through to the end.

From that time, the end wasn't far off. I think I could see it, and soon she could too. I became withdrawn, and shied away from her. I hardly looked at her and rarely spoke to her. It wasn't right and I didn't know how to fix it. I spent a week in this hermit-like state and couldn't get out of it. I hugged her at the end of each day, but at that time they became more of a matter of formality than of actual meaning. She began to move apart from me, and I from her. I wanted not to, but I couldn't help it.

Within that week of my depression and recession was encased a very special day: our anniversary. It was a year from the time that she had chosen to defy her parent's wishes again and begin the dating process with me anew. A year from one of the days I had considered among the most lovely of my life. I can still say that it was indeed a very momentous day for me, though recent events have removed it from that high place I once held it to be.

On the anniversary of that defiance of elders, she gave me a gift. Two, in fact. One was a ring. A plain ring, but nonetheless a token of our year together. The second was a card with a very sweet note and picture within it. I, being the total jackass I tend to be, had no gift in return. I accepted these things and held onto them, not wanting to lose them. I went home that night and had many a thought cross my mind. And with one solid thought in mind, I steeled myself in preparation for the next day.

The next day was just as grueling as the past days of the week. However, something was different. I held myself differently. With a determined posture, yet filled with sorrow, I marched through the halls. I had made my choice, the only thing left was to follow it through. So, at the end of the day, I walked to her locker to meet her, as was my wont. When I got there, she beat me to what I was going to say. She looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, "You're going to break up with me, aren't you?" And sure enough, that is what I had in mind. I tried my best to console her and gave her my shoulder to cry on. Thrice did someone ask me what was wrong with her. The first I told the leave, the second thought he wanted to fight me, but decided to walk away. The third happened to be my sister, who I rudely told to mind her own damn business. Then I turned back to the heartbroken girl on my shoulder and tried to mend the remains of a once prosperous relationship.

As with many things, it wasn't meant to be. After that day, she would have nothing to do with me. I kept trying to be her friend, but her heartbreak turned into fuel. They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Well this one became a right good crazy b***h. I couldn't even tutor her in math for all the hatred emanating off of her. Vocally, as well as in her glares. And her brother as well. The man she once considered her brother also caught a large portion of her anger. Him and I would try to help her in math, or try to talk to her, but she would make some snide comment and piss the both of us off. Much of what she said tended to be hypocritical and could very well be applied to herself in a negative manner.

Eventually, she lost the both of us completely. Neither of us talk to her, or even want to. She can't be near either of us without being absurdly rude. She constantly blabbers on about the most useless things and it would seem as if she doesn't care about anything anymore. But life goes on, and we all have to learn that sometime. Nothing is forever, but what is now can be worth holding on to.

I shall end this chapter here, with the promise of more in the future. Note that this chapter is not up-to-date, but what there is not enough of the material after this for a whole new chapter. Not yet at any rate.With this chapter there is much that is pure biased opinion, and hard to remember facts. I present the challenge to she whom this story is written about, that is any of it wrong, tell me and I shall see to it that the correct information is recorded herein.