Hesitation

For my Day One.

“I love you,” you spoke.

My heart ached.

If only you meant it.

How can you?

Love me?

Like a friend loves a friend.

That’s all we’ll ever be.

I'm just another jewel in your pocket.

Display me.

Then switch me out.

You’re too smart for me.

Too good for her.

But, but,

Does she know?

How well you love me.

How your dicks imprinted on my skin.

And how I slide it down my throat for your enjoyment.

Stop

Telling me you love me.

Because you don’t.

Or you do.

But, but,

Not in the way I want you to.

The word slips out of your mouth,

And God my hope rises.

The way you know when I'm depressed.

And you hold me.

The way I know when your stressed

And I hold you.

The way I want you to mean it.

I love you.

But, but,

Your lips are locked on hers.

How happy you make her.

They call it the honeymoon phase.

I call it my funeral.

Stop

Telling me you love me.

Because you don’t.

You can’t.

At least,

Not how

“I love you.”