Polly waited. Eyes settled on the wall opposite. Now and again
secretly, the eyes moved to the lips and the lifted spoon. Silver spoon
slightly tainted, not her job, but Dudman would blame her. Stiff necked
and pinched-faced. The Lady's eyes met Polly's. Coldness as if touched
by a corpse. The head held so. The chin poised as if half way between
words. The nose lifted for scent; the ears for sounds. Polly's eyes
averted. The mind full of tricks. The waiting game. How long between
slurps, she wondered. The lips parted as if words were about to be
spilled out, but none came. The hand raised; the spoon paused. Sighed,
the Lady. Polly held in check the ever ready smile; the grin settled
behind her mask of solemnity. The hands held in front of her stomach;
clutched in a prayer gesture; fingers entwined. What a face she's got on
her, Polly mused. What a sight for sore eyes, she mused deeper,
thinking of his Lordship away in the country, and Master George off
somewhere with his regiment, out of sight and out of touch. Thank the
Lord for that, Polly thought, lifting her chin, sensing the ache in her
back with the stiffness of it all.
"Tea, Perkins!"
the Lady said. The tray emptied. Moved to one side. Eyes on Polly; on
how she moved; how the uniform seemed drab; the girl such a mess, Lady
Elmore thought, taking a breath, settling back against her pillow. Polly
moved. The tray of tea things in her hands steadied; the eyes on the
bed; and where to place the damned thing, she mused, sensing the eyes on
her critical, a sigh breathed out. Laid tray gently on the bed as if
baby in a cradle had to be laid there instead of tea, jug, and such
things. The Lady's head nodded; the eyes settled on the cup and saucer;
the teapot; the sugar bowl and jug. Elmore wants it poured, Polly mused,
moving forward, placing finger on teapot, arranging teacup, and saucer
just so, turning all to be in reach.
"Pour,
Perkins," The Lady said. Head to one side as if she were a bird awaiting
a worm. Polly nodded. Sighed under breath. Let hand gently move cup;
lift teapot above at an angle; not to let drips fall in the lap; not
allow hot tea to scald. The thought, held in check like grin and
amusement, permitted the task to be done with the solemnity she'd
practised, repeatedly in her sleep. Could sleep now. Coldness in her
bones from attic and bed. Susie and her damned cold feet on her back;
her grubby fingers around the waist clutching for warmth. The tea
poured. The cup settled calm; the spoon, silver and tainted by the side.
The Lady's finger lifted the milk jug. Poured with daintiness; held
between the two fingers; poised as if about to dance some ballet in
miniature.
Polly watched. Sighed softly.
Sensed dampness between armpits; felt her stomach rumble; her eyes
scanned the room; the window; the curtains. Such a room she'd never
have; never sleep in such a bed; or have scene of greenery and
blossoming trees. Polly's had rooftops and dark walls or dull skies;
damp walls and the scent from the chamber pot after a night's pee. The
cup lifted and set before lips. Poised. The hand held in mid air like a
bird of prey waiting; the small digit pointing outwards. The other hand
rose and waved Polly back to her place. Moved backward. Footsteps slow.
Eyes lowered to the floor. Head forward slightly as if waiting her
beheading. Polly sensed the wall against her back. Brought her hands
over her stomach; settled as if to protect entrance. Master George;
hands on and hands off, depending on his mood. Away now, Polly mused,
running her tongue over lower lip, taking a small bite of her inner
cheek. A cough. Elmore choking on her tea? No such luck. Polly raised
the eyes. Elmore closed her eyes. Gone down the wrong way. The tea.
Serves her right, Polly mused, hiding a smile. The Lady told her to move
the tray. And the other one, Susie, dull girl, to take the other. The
cough settled. The face flushed. The eyes watery. The hands clutched
together like virgin's legs, Polly mused, lifting the tray and curtsying
and moving backwards. Holding the tray against her stomach, she opened
the door, then out in the passageway she closed it with a gentleness of a
tap on the back of a child. Sighed. Grinned. Poked out a tongue. Moved
to the top of the landing and stared at the stairs. Susie came upwards. A
smile broad as a horse's backside on her face; her hair gripped poorly
trying to escape her cap. Her nose dripping and reddened. Susie stomped
the stairs. Giggled behind her hand; pulled a face and nodded towards
the far off door where Elmore waited. Let her wait, Susie whispered; let
her rot in her bed, Polly mused, remembering cold feet, and a sniffing
nose and the coldness embracing her in the attic like death itself
enfolding her close in the dark and damp. Smiled. Sighed. Such is life.
Life is such. This life.