ON A LONELY SHORE 1962

A SCHOOLGIRL AND HER SCHOOLBOY LOVER AND DREAM IN 1962

I am the feeler of feelings,
said Yiska, my heart pounds
like a huge tongue within
a bell vibrating my being,

my eyes see him and want
him, wish to devour him whole
swallow him up between my
thighs; I am the dreamer of

dreams, I see him in school
and stand open mouthed like a  
fool, drool over him as he passes
by, lick my lips like lioness

at passing prey; he is my lover,
the center of my being, my sun
who draws me in, my needle
of my compass whose point

leads me back to joy and sadness
and joy once more; I am the
sensor of wild things, of deep
things within me, passions set

fire, burning desire; I see him
and my mind is in a mess, my
whole life hangs on a thread
and swings like a pendulum

over the yawning gap between
wanting and obtaining, between
having him and losing him,
kissing him in school and not

as we depart at end of day; in
my dreams at night in my hot
snug bed my arms about my
pillow it is he whom I kiss and

hug and hold so close, he my
lover, my school boy want of
kissing and more, here in my bed
alone like a ship stuck on wet
sands all a lonely sticky shore.