SOFT HUM 1971

A BOY AND GIRL IN A PSYCHIATRIC WARD IN 1971

Yiska said
the whole scene stank
I don't want
to be stuck
in the locked ward
another day

my bandaged wrist
stings like hell
she said

the big nurse eyed her

the radio was playing
some Beatles' song

come walk with me
I said
away from the others

so we walked along
the passage
along by the showers
and bathroom
and cupboards
for sheets and such

slept badly
she said
groans and moans
of others
that Scots woman
jabbering the night
the night nurse
doing f**k all
about her
just saying
it's her alcohol
wanting its feed

I held her hand
she squeezed it

if there was a place
I would right now
just f*****g do it

I wasn't sure
if she meant sex
or slitting her other wrist
or maybe both

we came to a locked door
and turned around
and walked back again

a nurse came to us
where are you two going?
she asked

Hell and back
Yiska said

she gazed
at our joined hands

where were you two
last night?
she said

sleeping in our beds
I guess
I said

you weren't there
when I looked
she said

Yiska said nothing
but peered past her

best get back to the lounge
breakfast will be
brought up soon
she said

she turned
and walked off
I gazed at her
swaying walk
the black and white
uniformed behind
holding my eyes

we parted hands
as we entered the lounge
her hand fell by her side

I sat by her
on the sofa
and waited for breakfast
to come
listening to the radio
and the other patient's
soft hum.