LIZBETH LET DOWN.

A BOY AND GIRL AND DISAPPOINTMENT IN 1961

Lizbeth let me out
the front door
while her parents rowed
in the kitchen
at the back

she was still only wearing
her panties and bra

she wanted me to stay
but I couldn't stomach
her parents finding me there
especially as they
were in a foul mood
rowing

she closed the door
and was gone

I waited for the next bus
back to my house
miles away
and wondered what
she would be doing
back at her place

would she get dressed?
would her mother notice
her own long red dress
had been taken out and worn?

I imagined her back
in her room sulking
because I hadn't
had sex with her
despite her planning
despite her standing
by her bed
in panties and bra

even when her parents
came home early
she was still up for it

I tried to imagine her
in her untidy room
putting on
the Fats Domino LP
and playing it loud
and prancing around
dancing

my bus came along
and I got on
and paid the fare

but unknown to me
she'd put on
the Buddy Holly LP
and sat
in her panties and bra
staring
and not caring.