Luke was not a great reader of fiction.

this is the beginning of a story of mine...its got a lot of work to be done

Luke was not a great reader of fiction. In high school, he struggled to get through the assigned novels, sometimes neglecting to finish them. To him, the very idea of a “story” seemed strange- a seemingly random selection of characters, all dealing with an artificial situation, usually quite contrived and absurd. In most cases, these characters somehow solved various problems or conquered villains, in order to achieve a “happy ending.”

True, he thought, there were the tragedies, where the hero died or love did not win out. But mostly, the concept of an “ending” did not really make sense to Luke. If by some miracle he actually made it to the end of one of his assigned torments, he was without exception left wondering, “What next?” Beginnings and endings confused him. What made one part of a person’s life so much more important than another? They were, in his eyes, equally important. There were of course those particular books which chronicled the life of a particular person to no apparent end, as far as Luke could see. Even at the end of such book, usually at the death of the main character, Luke would not be satisfied. “What next?” his mind would ask.

What next, indeed. To Luke, it was simply better not to ask at all. No matter how he approached it, he just could not compress life into a bundle of words inked to a page. “You think too much,” his teachers would say. Luke couldn’t argue with this- his mind worked constantly. In elementary school when most children would play on the swings, or group most suspiciously and trade cards, Luke sat by himself, his face screwed up in contemplation.

He was exceptionally bright, on this all of his educators had agreed upon over the years. If he got perfect scores on his exams, it was certainly not because he displayed any great interest in the subject- it was simply that he could comprehend it with utter ease. All that was needed for him to “get” a subject was a once-over by the teacher- a brief overview would suffice. The rest Luke seemed to intuit.

One would imagine Luke would have fit in quite easily with the other bright boys and girls of his class- but that was not the case. In fact, the smart kids possibly resented Luke more than anyone, if only because none of them had ever seen Luke study once in his life. To say that Luke didn’t “fit in” would have been an understatement- even misfits are usually able to find friends of some kind. No, it was not so much that Luke had tried and failed to find a niche among the populace; it was more that everyone else collectively ignored his presence. It was as if Luke’s existence was covered up as best as possible by some great conspiracy on the part of his schoolmates, perhaps even beyond them. New kids, upon being introduced to the school’s various cliques and social groups, were never told, “Oh that’s Luke- he’s strange. Don’t talk to him.” If Luke was referred to at all by anyone, even his teachers, the very mention of his name sent a slight shiver down everyone’s spine. It was as if Luke had been a secret the universe just couldn’t keep to itself, and to make up for that indiscretion, was swept under the proverbial rug to the best of everyone’s abilities.

This came as no surprise to Luke. His brightness did not stop at book smarts and academia- he fancied himself a fair judge of character as well. It was for this very reason that he had only one friend in the world. Everyone around him was incredibly transparent; their motives and opinions equally visible and unimportant to him. To call Luke “cold” would not be wrong; that is, he certainly seemed that way, and if called so, it is unlikely he would have denied it. However, on the whole Luke didn’t much care for anything anyone said, that is, except one.

It seemed a classic case of cruel irony, especially to those who wanted to be associated with Eric Adalbjorg. But mostly, it just seemed an odd pairing. Luke and Eric had been best friends since elementary school, and had remained so throughout middle and high school. While Eric’s circle of friends had grown, however, Luke remained as solitary as ever. It wasn’t simply in size of entourage that they differed either; in fact, the two were about as different as it is possible for two high-schoolers from the same town could be without bringing race or gender into the mix. Most, if they bothered trying to understand the two’s relationship at all, just chalked it up to opposites attracting, or perhaps some sense of obligation after so many years. But even Luke wondered about it sometimes, which was why on a Friday afternoon, he asked Eric about it during one of their online conversations.

“Why are we friends?” asked Luke in his usual blunt manner.

“Huh?” Eric replied.

“You know, why have we stayed friends so long? We’re both very different people.”

Eric knew better than to play coy with his unusual friend. Had it been anyone else asking him that sort of question, he would have played it off as being a stupid question, and given some anecdote about why they were still a necessary part of his social existence, even if he only knew them from some party he’d been to in the last month. Luke, on the other hand, didn’t waste words, or ask questions he already knew the answers to. If Luke was anything, it wasn’t trivial. Come to think of it, that was probably one of the reasons why he was still friends with him after so long, Eric thought. Being a naturally charismatic person, Eric knew a lot of people. It wasn’t so much that he was “the” popular kid- such people didn’t actually exist, not in his experience. There were, however, the kids that everyone looked at with a certain amount of awe, even if said awe was hidden deep under layers of resentment or jealousy. Eric was one of these, perhaps the one who inspired the most awe. He was a classic example of good breeding- good-looking, smart, funny, likeable- he was the kind of boy that, were of any lesser make, would have fallen into conceit and arrogance long ago. And perhaps he might have, were it not for Luke.

Though Luke didn’t know it, Eric often thought about how fortunate he was to know a person like his friend, particularly because of who Eric was. Luke had a way of sapping even the slightest feelings of superiority Eric had had over the years, and it wasn’t as if those feelings were few and far between. Being a respectable athlete, good student, favorite of his teachers, and nominee for practically every award the school had to offer, not to mention having adoration fawned over him by boys and girls alike, Eric couldn’t help but feel a bit self-satisfied once in a while. It was strange though, that the moment he would see his friend across the hall or coming up to him after school, he felt a sensation of being brought back down to earth. Consequently, those other feelings never had a chance to really take root.

“Well, I don’t know. You’re just different from most of my other friends. In a good way,” he added.

Luke digested this. “I hope so. Still, an example would be nice.”

Across from his monitor, Eric smiled. “Man, you have to be the most awkward person I know, without being totally gauche.”

“And that has to be the most contradictory statement I’ve yet read from you,” typed Luke. Instant messaging was a favorite form of communication between the two. Either by texting on their phones, or else email or IMing, both found it an easy way to say exactly what they meant, particularly Luke. Speaking was not a strong suit of his; not due to some apparent excess of shyness, but because he often had so many things to say that they all got caught in his throat, rendering him speechless. Being a faster typer than speaker, he had found his medium in the keyboard some time in middle school, and had used it ever since. Eric found it very helpful as well; it allowed him to converse on relatively equal ground with his friend.

“Gauche? Where did you pick that up? And thank you, I try.”

“Eh, some girl in class used it. Anyways, I’m still thinking about reasons why we still tolerate each other after all this time.”

“I’m going to rule out my obscene amounts of charm, just so we’re on even footing.”

Ah, Luke’s sense of humor. Perhaps the one aspect of Eric didn’t find oddly attractive about his friend. Eric didn’t doubt that Luke understood the roots of his undying sarcasm, but what irritated Eric was that he didn’t bother to change it. While a generally courteous person, if not overly so, Luke could always be counted upon to provide a rather cutting remark. Granted, Eric knew plenty of people who were outright rude- some of whom he counted among his other friends. But he often supposed that precisely because that trait was found in his “other” friends, it shouldn’t have a place in his best friend.

“And I’m going to rule out your sense of humor- oh wait, you don’t have one.”

The exchange quickly deteriorated into a typical conversation between the two friends, not unlike countless chats they’d had many times before. Still, throughout the rest of their talk, up until they said their goodbyes and signed off, they would each scroll up to that line with Luke’s question, and wonder.

 

◊

               

                Saturday came around with no particular fanfare, at least not for Luke. Weekends made little impression on him, unlike the rest of his classmates. Granted he might indulge in a bit more sleep, but on the whole Luke didn’t do much on his days off from school unless Eric invited him along somewhere. Otherwise, Luke could be relied upon to eat breakfast, go for a run, take a shower, check his horoscope, then lay on his bed with his headphones on for an hour or two. After that his foster mother would no doubt call him down to do some chore or another, which he would perform with his headphones on.

It was a general rule that Luke could always be found listening to his music outside of school, if he wasn’t talking to Eric. Some people could get away with doing both at once, but Luke’s headphones were of the noise-cancelling kind, and the moment he put them on he was dead to the world. That is of course, unless one was to say his name. He had the uncanny habit of hearing his name being said no matter how softly it was spoken, a habit which his mother had come to rely on.

Myrna and Gerald Jacobson had adopted Luke as a year-old infant. That was a guess, of course- Luke had come to the orphanage with no papers of any kind. In fact, no one could recall exactly how Luke had ended up there to begin with. It was a source of great confusion and annoyance throughout the adoption process, and in the end actually helped expedite matters, as the orphanage just wanted to be rid of the glitch in their system. Myrna and Gerald consequently combined Luke’s birthday with the day they brought him home. This was made known to Luke early on, and caused him no end of curious puzzlement because his horoscope was still quite accurate, despite the fact that his actual date of birth was unknown. He had initially scoffed at his daily readings, regarding them as proof that such things were a sham. But out of pure curiosity he had kept reading them, and his rejection had slowly turned to a genuine interest, if short of true belief. He supposed he might actually be a Virgo after all, but then again, what would it matter if he was? Luke liked his horoscope not because he felt he needed guidance, but because it felt almost as if it were possible for someone other than himself to understand him.

He was thinking about this as he raked leaves in the front yard. It was all too easy for him to get caught up in “deep” thoughts, as Luke liked to call them. He often wondered if anyone else thought about those kinds of things, or if it was exclusive to him. Nah, he thought. Just because I have no life and have nothing else to do but be all philosophical, doesn’t mean I’m the only one doing it.

But on a day like today, with the sky a delightfully mellow selection of slate grey clouds, and the ground covered in week old leaves, Luke couldn’t help but feel a little, dare he say it, lonesome. He could try to deny it, say that he preferred his own company to that of his classmates, but if there was one thing Luke couldn’t do with his mind, it was fooling himself. In all honesty, Eric wasn’t simply his best friend, but the only social connection Luke had made in all his eighteen years. How sad, he grimaced, tugging a handful of leaves from the teeth of the rake.

Luke stood up and looked around at the houses on his street- suburbia, in all its middle-class glory. It wasn’t that he felt he didn’t belong; it was more that Luke felt there was just something missing from it. Houses, cars, a kid on a bike up the street- everything was pretty much how it had always been. People had moved out, new younger couples had moved in, children grew up and went off to college, or didn’t. What’s wrong with me, wondered Luke. It’s not like this is anything new. But a sense of anticipation, perhaps expectation, had been slowly growing in him ever since the start of senior year. Something was supposed to change, had to change, but Luke didn’t know what that something was. An unreasonable feeling based on nothing, that’s what it boiled down to, he supposed. Better to not dwell on it, better to focus on things that yielded real results, like raking the yard.

Thirty minutes later, Luke decided the yard looked about as good as it was going to get, and headed inside. His parents had gone out to run some errands and were not due back for some time. Grabbing some leftovers from the fridge, Luke ate his lunch in silence as he stared out the kitchen window. Grey clouds, grey life. Well, at least food still held some charm- no one cooked meatloaf like his dad. Ha, Dad, thought Luke in a rapidly deteriorating sense of glum. I wonder who my real Dad is. Or Mom, for that matter. Oh come off it, rebuked his rational side. They’re most definitely your parents, if only lacking in biological holdings.

Eh what’s the use in thinking about this, he thought as he slid off his barstool. Just another case of the weather affecting my mood, I guess.

Just then, the phone rang. It was a most distinctive ring, a very kitsch-y classical tune his mother thought amusing. Guests found it alarming; Luke simply found it annoying after all these years. “Hello?”

“Ah, hey, Luke.”

“Hey, Eric. What’s up,” said Luke, looking up at the ceiling. He found it ironic how, just minutes after feeling sorry for himself about having so few friends, he could feel mildly irritated towards the one person who bothered to call him.

“Ah, nothing much man. I was wondering though, if,” started Eric.

“Wondering what?” interrupted Luke. Geez, Luke, how much ruder can you be, he wondered.

“Hey, let me finish. I was going to ask if you wanted to come to a party with me tonight.”

A rather perplexed expression settled most suddenly on Luke’s face. “A party?”

“Yeah, nothing big. Just some friends are gonna come over, you know. There’ll be music,” added Eric.

“Exactly, your kind of music. What’s this all about, anyways? You’ve never invited me to one of these things before.”

“Well it’s not like you’ve ever asked to come. I know they’re not your thing and all, but it’s the first one of senior year, and I figured it was time you let loose, and, you know,” trailed Eric.

“’You know’ what?” asked Luke. He better not say what I think he’s going to say, he thought.

“Ah, lighten up?” It didn’t take much to imagine Eric wincing over the phone.

“Thanks for that.”

“Hey, you know it’s true. Anyways, I’ll pick you up at nine.”

“Nine? That’s kinda late for a party, isn’t it?”

“Ah, that’s just so we can get something to eat first. The actual party’s not til 10:30.”

“What.”

“Hey, I have to go; I’ll call you when I’m leaving. Bye!”

The sound of the click left Luke with a sense of mild confusion and an unexpected case of anticipation. Granted, he wasn’t used to staying up past 9 or 10, and even then it was him in bed listening to music before going to sleep. But, perhaps this sort of social interaction was exactly what he needed. There was, however, the little problem of clearing it with his parents. They were big on planning- spontaneity was not one of their strong suits. And of course there was the matter of the hour, and it being at a strangers house, and-

“Of course you can go!” said Myrna without hesitation when Luke asked them upon their return. “Finally, you’re getting out of the house on a Saturday night,” she added as she set down a bag of groceries. The early autumn sunset cast an orangey glow on Luke’s rather shocked face.

His father nodded as he put a carton of eggs in the fridge. “It’s about time you did something other than watch TV or sit with your headphones on. Do something constructive.”

“How is going to a party constructive?” asked Luke. “And I thought you’d be less okay with it than you are, what with it being held so late and at some guy’s house…” Blank expressions. “A guy who I don’t know…” gestured Luke.

“Well, are you okay with it? You’re not a kid anymore, Luke. You can go out and have fun, you know. Besides, you’re going with Eric.” Myrna must have noticed Luke’s eye begin to twitch; “What’s that look for?”

“Oh nothing, I just didn’t know that I needed a male escort to go out.”

Gerald raised an eyebrow. “Exactly how many times have you gone out this week, not counting going to the store?”

“So? At least I get good grades! ‘School is my job’ so you say,” Luke protested.

“We all know you don’t study, so it’s not like you hole up in your room doing schoolwork.”

“Look,” began Myrna. “We’re glad you’re actually choosing to go to this thing. We know how introverted you are- don’t give me that look. Don’t get us wrong, we aren’t those ‘cool’ parents,” she said with a wink to Gerald, “but you have to admit, most parents don’t have to try to coax their child to go play outside.”

“Well I just seem to remember you two being more restrictive about that sort of thing,” said Luke, feeling a bit foolish.

“No, that was you. Now,” began Myrna, putting the last of the groceries away, “we’re going to go upstairs and lay down for a bit. Let us know when you leave, and ask Eric to leave a number that we can reach you at. It’s been a long day for us, and we need to put our feet up.”

Luke listened to the creaking of the stairs as he parents, no- adopted parents, went upstairs. God, why was that so suddenly important these days? He had his guesses, but the truly discomforting part was that he truly didn’t know. With a silent sigh he resumed his position at the kitchen table, staring out the window.

 

◊

 

In another house, in another, slightly nicer, neighborhood, Eric was more than a little irritated. He’d been waiting for a good half hour to use the bathroom. Unfortunately, he wasn’t the only one in his house with plans that night, and he’d had to wait through two of his older sisters to do their thing, and was now waiting on his older brother as well.

“Come on, Jon, why do you take so long? I have plans tonight!”

“Yeah, well, who doesn’t? Now shut up and let me finish or I’ll take even longer! Goddammit, you made me cut myself shaving!”

Eric, frustrated and defeated, returned to his room. It wasn’t simply his house’s lack of bathrooms that was making him irritated, but more specifically the party he was nearly set to go to that night. Sitting at his laptop, he couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty about bringing Luke along. Granted, he really did think that it was high time Luke moved outside his comfort zone, but in all honesty it wasn’t the reason why he’d asked him to come. He knew Luke was not the kind of person who would enjoy the atmosphere of a house party, and his friends made no effort to conceal their distaste for him. But Luke’s attendance had less to do with Luke, and more to do with Eric. The truth was that, if things went badly that night, Luke could provide an exit strategy.

Now, it was not as if such subterfuges were at all in Eric’s nature. Drama had never been a part of his life unless it was brought in by someone else’s indiscretions. Eric had acquired a reputation among his social group as a fixer, a problem solver, a giver of sound advice. It was rather ironic, but most of that good sense came from Luke. Over the years, Luke had indirectly settled more disputes, solved more problems, and fixed more broken friendships than the entire guidance department at their high school. This was made more astonishing by the fact that no one who had taken Luke’s advice knew it came from him, and Luke had absolutely no idea that he was being used to help the same people who disliked him so intensely. The likelihood of either party finding out about each other was incredibly unlikely, and even if they did, such a revelation would yield only apathy. Luke would relish having others put his words into action, and while Eric’s friends would no doubt be a bit put off by the news, their collective pride would prevent any backlash. And while such a massive conspiracy could, in some cases, be listed under subterfuge, Eric’s mind had yet to connect the proverbial dots, and so still believed that “drama” had no hold on him. There was, however, a certain matter that had come up in recent months that had pushed Eric to redefine what was necessary in order to keep the peace, so to speak. This matter was, in fact, a girl.

When it came right down to it, there wasn’t much to tell. The summer prior, Eric had met a girl who quite frankly wanted more from him than he was willing to offer. He’d done his best to let her down gently, but to no effect. Each time he would tell her there was nothing between them, she would change the subject somehow. And it wasn’t as if Eric was a pushover either- steadfast on the field, so in life. But in this one instance, Eric had met his match in persistence. At first, he had taken the high road and simply declined to hang out with her, and avoided going anywhere she was to be found. But that soon proved to not be enough- she somehow obtained his number and his screen name, and had begun contacting him by those means. In the end, he’d had to block her number and get a new screen name, which had been the worst part because he’d had it for years.

At any rate, she’d been effectively erased from his life for the past month, and Eric had finally begun to allow himself a breath of relief. Hell hath no, for sure. Things were going back to normal, that was the thinking. However, it had come to his attention that this very same girl was going to be at the party Eric was to attend in a few short hours. His first reaction would have been to say he couldn’t make it, and ask who it was that she knew at the party to warrant her presence, but that was unfortunately not possible. The thing was, he had told absolutely no one about meeting her, or his subsequent evasion of said crazy person, as he liked to put it.

When he’d first met her, he’d thought nothing of it. They got along well enough, talked with ease about nothing at all, laughed. She didn’t know anyone he knew, and so he was under no obligation to introduce her- the source of his current frustration. Had they known what was going on, his school friends would have gladly helped him out; but if Eric were to try to tell them everything now at the last minute, they would simply get heated that Eric had neglected to tell them about all of this to begin with, and might even purposely expose him to the very girl he was trying to avoid.

He’d thought of cancelling, period, but he’d already confirmed his intention to attend at least five times already. The whole thing reminded him of a scenario in some teenage TV soap opera, which exasperated him further, because he just wasn’t that kind of person. His friends easily confused plain stupidity with malicious intent, an unfortunately immutable trait.

Luke knew, of course. That is to say, he was aware that Eric and the girl had met, talked, found each other to be incompatible, and thus parted ways. That was what Eric had told him. At the time, that was more or less the truth; Luke didn’t need to know the gritty details. He had however failed to mention the entire stalking segment, which at the time, it was true, would have made Luke most insistent to interfere. Eric had decided to fix things himself instead, to great disaster- a fact which, despite Luke’s affection for his friend, would not escape his notice.

Eric breathed a sigh of despair. He already knew that the night would not end well, but there was nothing he could do about that. The most he could do was to hope that Luke would insist on going home before the girl found out Eric was there, or at least before anything truly bad happened. It wasn’t much, and highly unlikely, but it was something. As he rushed into the bathroom in the wake of his idiot brother, he took comfort knowing that whatever happened, he’d look damn good.

 

◊

 

Now, it wasn’t that Luke lacked a sense of style; no, however much his classmates thought him awkward or plain disliked him, all would agree it was not because of how he dressed. If anything, there were some who flat out envied him. Aesthetic may not have been Luke’s strong suit, but he was at any rate highly in tune to what was popular with everyone else. Fashion and appearance all depended on knowing the opinions of others, and in this he was a master. To some it would seem strange that someone so thoroughly unpopular would even bother to dress well, but that would assume Luke was trying to impress somebody. That may very well have been a part of it, but a very small one to say the least. Personal pride served as a better motivator, in his opinion.

Dressing for a party was no exception, although Luke doubted there were any special rules dictating any sort of dress code. So on went his favorites; well, that was until he changed his mind about his shirt. But wait, that pair of jeans had a stain on them. That belt would be nice with those pants, but ugh, that button-up looked terrible with it. This process of slow decay in personal integrity went on for about fifteen minutes before his eyes caught a glimpse at the clock. Eric was due in less than twenty minutes, so Luke made some snap decisions; after all, who really cared what he was wearing?

By the time he’d brushed his teeth, put some stuff in his hair, and applied some sort of fragrance in what he prayed was the appropriate amount,  Luke could hear voices down in the kitchen. Coming down the stairs, he was not surprised to see Eric and his mother conversing. Eric came over on a semi-regular basis, and his mother adored him. Perhaps it was because Eric was the only guest Luke had ever willingly had over and had return; she treated him like her second son. All the frivolous, gossipy, social sorts of mothering that Luke simply didn’t take to, Eric received in bucket loads, and loved every minute of it. Luke would never admit it, but it was one possible reason that he still found him valuable as a friend. Eric helped divert the bulk of Myrna’s great heady river of mothering away from Luke, who quite frankly thought it a bit much.

 

Author's Note

This is incomplete. The end is not a true ending; its where i last stopped writing.