Heart Stop Now

Life was at its peak in your embrace
A sense of wholeness no one can replace
Time frozen still in a blissful moment
As I thanked God it was I you had chosen

Now solitarily I roam my barren purgatory
A man past his greatest dreams of glory
Unanswerable questions plague my every thought
A fractured soul, damned to be infinitely lost

Oh, how I wish I had died back when
Nothing else mattered except us holding again
The most perfect feeling when the background fades
Silencing even my loudest and most violent inner tirades

When I had found the most peace I could've ever dreamed
And I thought for sure my very being was redeemed
As if the tortures of the past had never been born
And I had never known ridicule, hatred, and scorn

Yes, that would be the time I would choose for my death
Believing I was loved, as I expressed to you in my last breath
Happily I would've ascended to another plane
My life, was complete, and I would find you again

But no, I would not be granted such serenity
As fate, or God, or the devil, drove you away from me
My very essence run ragged searching for a reason
And I go on, on hands and knees, through my darkest season

Reviews

[StateofHope]

Well done. It felt like I heard the full story with your work, which isn’t always the case with some poems. I have never found such a woman, so I cannot begin to fathom the peaks and blissfulness you spoke of. I can empathize with much of the rest however, with life’s realities that can, at the bare minimum give him woe. To breaking a man, where he is in the fetal position consumed by escaping reality in both mind and body and liquids flowing freely from his body.