Lee and Jekyll and Hyde

Every day since you left there's a fight between the three of me
The love and the nothing and the hate all fighting constantly
I struggle maintaining the truth of who I believe is the real one
The one you helped build from the bottom up from just a crumb

I walk in the light of love so blindly following your trail
It just feels right all through my soul to not fail
Keep holding on to the belief that love will conquer all
And one day soon you'll come home and into my arms you'll fall

The nothing slowly crawls all through my mind all day
Wanting me to shut down, built a wall, nothing to say
The honest reaction to the pain in which I've been living
Like a fortress protected from within, nothing comes in, and no giving

Hate....anger....grudge...revenge...feels inherited in my blood
All the emotions I locked away to make myself a sole room for your love
A million names I want to shout and a million more ways to hurt
But I've grown...and I know regret, it's a mouth full of dirt

So to those that tell me it's ok to be angry or to just "love myself"
I know myself better than all, I can forsee that walk way in to a deeper hell
When you question why I still shower this angel with all the love I have in the world
Just know that through and through, she's my everything, my once in a lifetime kind of girl