Influence

Something I wrote while listening to a song a while ago.

I take possession of your body before you can block me out. I control your every thought and movement. You’re under my influence now... I’m getting my grip upon all your systems. Nothing you do anymore is for yourself but rather to heed my demands.  The smoke in your eyes is the residue of the mind you left behind. I’m steadily sinking in. As you begin to lose hearing all you can understand is the hissing of my voice in your ears. I am succeeding. You are lost in the mist only looking for that faint light from the far off lighthouse. The dark sky shrouds your mind and the thunder scares every ounce of bravery left in you. You scream every time you hear the rattles of my laugh. My eyes are everywhere to you and I watch your moves with synchronization you could never comprehend. You’re beginning to lose your mind aren’t you? My pull is too strong for you isn’t it? You weren’t strong enough to resist me when we first met so how would you be able to now? You are a disgrace. No one wants you. I’m the only one who will accept you…

Yet you keep fighting. You go to others for help and they don’t know what to do. Laughing at their efforts knowing nothing is going to break my hold on you. It’s the perfect spell… But why do you still keep hope through all this pain? You should be dead now, dead inside. I should have control, complete control. But I don’t and this makes me fear for the worst. Then far in the corners of your mind I see little cracks. I’m losing it now, my claws are releasing grip on your sorrow and fear. How are you regaining composure? You’ve broken my trance and you’ve taken away my source of power, thrown it away to rot… You know what I’ve been doing to you? Your memories of me make you go into withdrawal and I still laugh because the pain never leaves. You say you’re doing better to yourself every morning. I’m pushed to the back of your mind forgotten about. Abandoned…

 But one day I will be back, to set my spell on yet another weak soul. This is how I survive. My life is in cycles and my power comes and goes but they all never forget the influence I had upon their lives. They are lost and some never find a way to get out of my clutches. 

Reviews

[AprilRN1210]

I like the idea of this piece-it has a lot of potential. It does get a little confusing in spots and some areas would benefit from further expansion and explanation. Overall, it is pretty good.

[Tech]

Thank you very much and I do agree it could be polished a lot. I might revisit it but it's something I wrote as a teen so I might just leave it be, not sure yet. Either way it was nice to see that I had some potential when I was younger and hope that I have improved a lot from then but thank you for the feedback it gives me a lot to think about for my future writing.

[AprilRN1210]

you're welcome.. I think it could be cool to rework this into something.. I wasn't lying when I said it had potential..

[Tech]

Hmm since you seem pretty into the idea and PsyOps was also into the idea of this "character" I created maybe I'll have a second go at it. I should have sometime when I am done with the current project that I am working on is done. I hope you will check back once and a while to see if I get time to revise :).

[AprilRN1210]

Just drop me a note and lemme know when you do..... I would love to see what you do with it...

[Tech]

Awesome, I will for sure.

[SquinklaPsyOps]

I like the poem, it could probably fit for a demon character in a novel without a body that can read minds and that is trying to control a person body at all costs because it needs to possess persons to think it exists.

[Tech]

I like the fact that it can be interpreted that way :). The original intent of this poem was I had some friends that got into some hard drugs and I saw the way that it affected them. When I was listening to a song this all started formulating in my head and I kinda personified the drugs that "took over their minds." It's really cool to see how something I wrote about an experience I saw could be turned into something that could be portrayed in media. Thank you so much for your input and I might have to borrow your idea for a game in the future ^_^.