confusion

just about the confusion in my life

The truth I can't speak inside my soul

It burns me inside, enflamed as hot coal

It's true that my secret is known by just one

Although I'm still scared, that they won't get it

I don't understand the laws of this life

what do I need to pass through ths strife?

A man in my life to please others near? Oh no, thats not true,

A girl in my life, to help me forget all I've been put through,

perhaps in time I'll forget my dark fate

But for now I'll hide

My secret at stake,

and I'll just lay here

confused...

Reviews

[Andromeda.]

The feeling is widely relatable, but the poem isn't original. It's a string of thoughts, and although the confession is admirable, it doesn't seem that it took a lot of effort to craft it. I see a lot of potential in the fire/burning motif though, and the way it connects to "my secret is at stake" made me think of witch-burnings, which further ties into "my dark fate", "laws of this life" and "my soul" - you could create something outstanding if you continue conveying confusion through these connections. I don't want to give too many ideas, and I wasn't sure if I should review but I wanted to be honest. All the best, -L

[AlternativePunker]

Wow, this is really expressive.
I have a feeling that you are cunfused that if you like girls or boys, is this correct?

[Taz]

Perhaps it may be.

[AlternativePunker]

I don't mean to sound rude, I was just curious

[Taz]

It's fine.

[Taz]

Thank you for reading.

[AlternativePunker]

No problem, it's a nice poem

[Taz]

Thank you.

[Duncan Brown]

Thank love........................................................................................................................................................................................................as

[Najam Us Saher]

You expressed your emotions really well. Everyone faces this situation most of the times. Some things keep bothering us and unable to find a solution makes us restless.