confusion

just about the confusion in my life

The truth I can't speak inside my soul

It burns me inside, enflamed as hot coal

It's true that my secret is known by just one

Although I'm still scared, that they won't get it

I don't understand the laws of this life

what do I need to pass through ths strife?

A man in my life to please others near? Oh no, thats not true,

A girl in my life, to help me forget all I've been put through,

perhaps in time I'll forget my dark fate

But for now I'll hide

My secret at stake,

and I'll just lay here

confused...

Reviews

[Andromeda.]

The feeling is widely relatable, but the poem isn't original. It's a string of thoughts, and although the confession is admirable, it doesn't seem that it took a lot of effort to craft it. I see a lot of potential in the fire/burning motif though, and the way it connects to "my secret is at stake" made me think of witch-burnings, which further ties into "my dark fate", "laws of this life" and "my soul" - you could create something outstanding if you continue conveying confusion through these connections. I don't want to give too many ideas, and I wasn't sure if I should review but I wanted to be honest. All the best, -L

[Sarah Jane]

Not bad, I have felt similar and the message spoke to me. Secrets can hang heavy on someone. Especially with no one to share that burden with and you don't know how to make yourself feel better without anyone elses help. Good write.

[LKBillips]

This poem makes me think of a person confused on who to love as what the world dictates is acceptable or by what their heart really desires. Either way very interesting and well laid out.

[TonightWeDine]

Very thoughtful and expressive.

[Kay]

"I don't understand the laws of this life" - powerful line. I think we can all relate. The structure of this poem flows well. Visually, it displays the confusing thoughts piling one of top of the other, ending with "..." as a sign of not having reached any resolution. I also like the image of "enflamed as hot coal" within your soul. It really expresses the burning sensation of carrying a deep secret.

[EcstaticEuphoria]

The laws of this life haunt us all or do their best to keep us bound, yet who created them, who made them law that must be obeyed? Such a contemplation, such a painful recollection. Loved the rawness and poignancy of this.

[Hebe]

The skeleton in the closet... the uneasiness lingers just under the skin... good job expressing the confusion !

[Kimiko Watson]

I can so relate to this Taz. Love it.

[wordman]

secrets and confusion is a big factor in life,liked your write

[Coyote Poetry]

Secret, confusion and understanding life. I believe all of us have secrets. Some need to lay bury. A interesting poem. Left the reader with something to ponder. Thank you Taz for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote