October 18, 2004

this is a true story about my siamese cat named Little White Kitty (yet she wasn't even white...)

It was centuries ago.  The day my cat died ranked at the top of my "Worst Days" list and began a long line of deaths year after year in my family.  I heard myself screaming her name over and over.  I watched her body slide limply across the road that morning.

The day was beautiful.  Crisp air cooled my face generously as it carried the brilliant scent of the bright green grass occupying my front yard.  Tiny patches of frost sprinkled the perfect grass like a peanut butter cookie dashed with sugar.  I waited to cross the road alongside my younger brother, Tristan, my younger sister, Cassidy, and my babysitter, Marissa (who also happened to be my neighbor).  Marissa had forgotten something at her house.  The cars passed lazily on the dark road.

A car, not fully awake, drove by and a semi zoomed past a few seconds later.  The semi had no extraordinarily fearsome qualities apart from its largeness.  Suddenly, fear attacked my heart.  Milliseconds before the collision, I recognized a familiar ball of black and white fuzz.

"Little White Kitty!!!" I screamed helplessly at the top of my lungs.  I surged forward in a frantic desire to save my beloved friend, my furry sister.  Marissa yanked me back.  Why was she just laying there waiting for the semi to hit her!?  It was then that I realized I would watch my own cat die.  I didn't even close my eyes as the semi sent her body, perhaps already dead, skidding across the road.  The semi sped onward, not hesitating to see what it carelessly murdered.  All I heard was desperate screaming, my desperate screaming.  Tears rushed down my face.  A scratchy sensation clawed at my throat.

Being small for an eight-year-old, Marissa carried me all the way back to the house.  I glanced up at the walls standing motionless; emotionless.  Beneath me, the dryer kur-plunked away.  These things didn't know my cat just died a horrible death, nor did they care.  I was still wailing, a million things buzzed through my ming like bees, stinging me over and over.  My cat...  I watched her body slide across the road.  She's dead, I heard myself thinking.  She's not coming back.  Ever.  My vision blurred again.

Finally, my mother arrived home.

"Mom, L-L-Little White Kitty's d-dead!" I half screamed between sobs.  "I s-s-saw her get hit b-by a truck!"

"I didn't see anything on the road when I pulled in," She tried to reason with me.  Somehow, I was forced to go to school, still in tears.  The day lasted forever.

After school, mom picked me up instead of making me ride the bus.  Her eyes, red and puffy, made sure to stay focused on her hands clutching the steering wheel more tightly than usual.  Dirt smeared her hands faintly.  She washed them quickly before hurrying to the car to get us from school.

"Little White Kitty wasn't dead.  She dragged herself all the way up the driveway.  I found her by the garage door.  I took her to the vet today while you were at school." she whispered painfully.  I took no notice of the hurt in her voice as I began to comment with a "So she's not dead!?" or a "She's alive!?" but Mom spoke before I could.

"But she had to be put to sleep.  She must have loved us a lot to pull herself all that way."  She tried unsuccessfully to change the subject.

"You put her to sleep?"  My voice broke.

"And I buried her.  Did you want her to hurt?  She's in heaven now with--"  The rest of my mother's conversation went unheard.  She didn't believe in heaven, nor did I.  

How could my own mother bury my cat without me there?  The last time I saw her was when she was sent spiraling across the road by that evil semi.  I never got the chance to say goodbye.  I will never get that chance.  If only I had made sure she was inside....  Then she might still be here with me....  I don't care if it's for a minute or for a day.  I just want to say goodbye....

Reviews

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Awww...... This is sad, I dont have much else to say about it... Poor kitty :/