Train

Train

A Poem by Tavar
"

Asked for 1 word to write a poem. That word was train.

"

This morning on the platform

I ran into your sight

Your gaze froze me in place

Love at first light

That train I won’t forget

The day holds me tight

This morning on the platform

I knew it was right

© 2015 Tavar


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Reviews

I really enjoyed this poem, but I feel as if it might be better to switch light and sight. That sound better to me..

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tavar

8 Years Ago

I can see where you would like that, but the idea was the twist on love at first sight and go with l.. read more
👏👏 I like the "love at first light" line...but the ending feels a bit unfinished because of the rhyme scheme? Perhaps one more line at the end would sound more complete. ^^

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tavar

8 Years Ago

Yes, That has been bothering me as well! I feel I need to finish this better. I plan to work on it m.. read more

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Stats

175 Views
3 Reviews
Added on November 13, 2015
Last Updated on November 13, 2015
Tags: love, train

Author

Tavar
Tavar

IA



Writing
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