Second Hand

I feel so used 

Womanized

By everyone

I let them do this 

To please them

But validation is only a fraction

I feel sick to my stomach 

Thinking of everything that has happened 

I am one of millions upon millions 

Who go through this unhealthy cycle 

Could be days apart 

Could be weeks, months or even years 

But no matter the distance 

The cycle remains the same

Acceptance vs Abandonment 

Why do I always get the second?

I have issues 

But from where have they spawned?

I have come to discover, why I allow it

Because I need something

Something physical 

Something emotional

Something real 

But what is real?

This isn't real 

It's never been real

But I continue in hopes of finding " real "

A fool I am

I never wanted this

All I wanted was to be held 

A normal human desire 

A longing 

That contact 

Is what mattered most to me 

But nothing comes without a price

It was an exchange and it always is 

That dream of being cuddled is constantly becoming twisted and distorted

All for personal gain

Lustful fantasies in exchange for something fake 

Only to find that a false hope is what I am given the next morning

Then they move on to the next and the next and the next with ease 

Degrading and objectifying

Turning on us

Making us feel like we are insane

Making us feel like the villains simply because we want love

Strutting around like a peacock 

Not a care in the world 

As long as they get their piece they are content 

But yet ironically enough

Never fully satisfied

But it's all fun and games 

Until reality strikes

Should a problem arise 

They run the other way 

The greatest cowards of all

Claiming they are the victim 

That they are still too young

No sense of responsibility 

No maturity 

No regard for anyone or anything 

But what are WE? 

We are second hand 

All we ever want is love 

But we get nothing

Nothing in return but heartache 

For always giving in 

It has become an irresistible norm to us 

That inevitably will destroy us inside and out

THEY? Are emotionless statues

Ruthless seducers of the mind 

Illusionists of hopes and dreams 

The true villains of the world

We may be used but in the end

Perhaps...

We are the heroes 

And I'd like to think that 

In another life 

In another world 

We are the strongest of them all