I Suck At Creating Titles...HUMANITY SUCKS/ROCKS!!!

A Story by Tazz S.H.

A journal entry :]

Hello, notebook.

We meet again. I’m back, I suppose. It’s sometime after one in the morning. I’m supposed to be sleeping, but I can’t. Fluffing pillows, moving around…it’s not helping. There’s these two songs that have lyrics that keep echoing in my mind…"I’m Not Okay” by MCR and “Helena” also by MCR. “What’s the worst thing you could say? So long and goodbye.” from Helena and “I’m not okay” from…well, it’s obvious. And idk, these tunes keep echoing in my brain…

And just…out of the blue, I start thinking about things. “If you should know anyone at all, you should know yourself.” That’s what popped into my head. I mean, you’re you. You’re the only person who’ll ever come closer than anyone else who’ll know what you’re feeling. You’ve known yourself since childhood…your life…you recollect all the memories, the things you’ve learned, the morals you’ve built…anything…everything. I don’t know where I’m going with this…

All I know is there’s just this one word flickering through my nerves, flashing in front of my eyes, echoing in my ears, beginning at my lips…is this normal? Maybe that’s just the way things are. As you grow up, you have to faces these things. Things that happen to you. How it affects you. And…it’s just so strangely cruel…or amazing, fascinating, uniquely weird, unusual that I’ve realized how beautiful humanity is. How dreadfully, awfully and utterly beautiful it can be, and also how…wretched, repulsive, disgusting and disorderly it can also be. It’s the swirl of emotions that gets to the core of you…It’s hard for me to explain what I mean. It’s like…I feel like there are no human words for this. Humanity…it’s just unbelievable. It’s beautiful. I know I keep saying that a lot, but it’s true.

Our world is in deep distress, not in all areas, not in all places, but it exists. People think that if their life were perfect, that if they had zero problems, then it’d be bliss. No. It can’t be. Do you know how boring, how miserable we’d be if it were that way? We’re human. We need obstacles, we need challenges, we need things to keep us busy, help us learn; grow in mind, body and spirit. Without our problems, we can’t be anybody. Because that’s when you’re being put to the test. Human tragedy is the greatest thing given to man. Yeah, it can be a pain in the a*s, but look at yourself. You’re grown up. You can think, act, do, say. And so much more…

Your mind. You. You. You’re beautiful. Your existence. Your humanity. Look at the amount of personality, the soul, that has crept into your eyes. Look at the intelligence they hold.

You’re not some…some animal, wild, on the loose, dangerous. You’re human. You have power. You have knowledge. The ability to understand. Intelligence. You have a conscience. You have a heart. And not just a simple organ that functions in your body. A real heart, that loves, and cares, that carries emotions, words, thoughts. But just because you aren’t an animal, doesn’t mean you’re superior. In fact, you may be inferior. The animals, have an advantage over you. They’re not human. They’re not expected to act as we do. A wild animal won’t take pity on its prey. It won’t stop and think “Hey, maybe I shouldn’t eat this cute little rabbit. Lemme just take my fang out of it’s face and let it live it’s life, yeah?” But the world, what’s the point of it? It spins. Time passes. We move forward. We progress. We advance. It’s an endless cycle.

History will leave its mark in our world. But the point is, we’re all moving towards the future. The animal won’t pity its prey. It’ll do what it needs to survive. Feed. Kill. Invade. Build. That’s the problem with us humans. We have too many emotions. We linger in our pain. It’s our weakness. It’ll always be. We do, say, act how we think is right, and to ourselves, we’re heroes. We dwell in the glory. Humanity is both our greatest strength and greatest weakness. Where does it come from? God gave us this ability. And that’s the beauty of it, when we can comprehend what other organisms cannot. But it slows our duties, allows us pain, which we need to grow and learn, and by the time you die, hey, you’ll say “I’ve had a good life.”

I don’t know why I’ve been ranting on about this. Maybe it’s just when you realize something great, the humanity in you wants you to share it with others, because you care about them. Maybe this helps. I, for one, know it has. Maybe I can sleep tonight, in peace, knowing full well that my stomach has stopped rumbling. And not from hunger. But from satisfaction. From the fact that I know that I can wake up tomorrow morning and know who I am a little bit more. From the fact that I know I’ll share this with those dear to me. From the fact that I know that this isn’t the end. The humanity in me will thirst, the world will thirst, and I’ll write for them. For everyone. For all of us. For you.

Enough said, signing out, and goodnight. ^_^ x_x :3

-ElfPunkette