Creepy self-absorption

  

My restless, unchained writhing in spawned honey-warmth, like a derailed shipwrecked malicious imagination. I feed on sadness. My head is a blood-red twilight. I know that I can only be a part of the One-Whole. The days closed to me still faithfully preserve the spark-igniting fervor of thoughts, even as the heat-stitches burning on my body.

The dying sun paints flame-roses on my inflamed, feverish face. As if I were trembling in anticipation of my dying destruction. Once again they are saturated with shivering metropolitan Nineveh crowds of humanity. And if someone thinks of the black-clad Death, they simply wave away. A searching laser beam, if only there were human treasured eyes, which immediately condemns liars and fakes, while immediately praising truth and honesty, like the self-clarifying, holy will. Why do today's waves of multiplied grief flow like a single fiery, cosmic white glow, while sinking the accelerating time into the ground?! - It is a self-deluding, gracious consolation that one cannot find forgotten, neglected treasures among creative, performance workshops and unknown artists - who believes that a loyalist in his life is successful only a hundred years after his death?!

Amidst falling darkness I roam reclusively; there is no dialogue between past and future. All connections seem to be lost. Even the one who was brought by the black wind to re-establish order on treacherous ruins is lying. Smoldering in the pitch-dark furnace of everyday life, our protective hope crumbles into embers. Our flirtatious star-eyes look like irregular star-chemistry. Is happiness also so complicated and only available to those who lie to themselves in exchange for dreams?! �" The bribed, dense grids of our lives were permanently covered by permanent cowardice and fear of death. Aggressive hatred left scars on our faces - it's long overdue!