Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock

This was a poem I wrote for a contest on another site and I got 2nd place, please read and comment!!

 

Tick tock, tick tock

 

Falling, falling, fallen

Falling through the clouds

 

My heart drops

To the pits of hell it goes

 

No sound in this darkness

Silence is all I hear

 

The clock strikes

Tick tock, tick tock

 

I've run out of time

Midnight has come

 

With the strike of the clock

The strike on my heart comes

 

All is lost

All is gone

 

Tick tock, tick tock

Hope is gone

 

Tick tock, tick tock

My soul has gone

 

Tick tock, tick tock

Was it worth it?

Author's Note

Please comment! This was a poem I wrote for a contest and won 2nd place! I love comments please!!

Reviews

[patricia]

Interesting poem. good pace. flows well. Thanks.

[Stella]

You did a very good job with this poem and it's easy to see why you got awarded for your poem. I like the question at the end because it made me wonder "was it worth it? "

[Pi Cee]

The clock goes tock in the middle of night. With it goes hunger, joy, pride, patience, but as does time. Good piece.

[Mary Fioratti]

Yes, I could say it it is worth each "tick tock"... I guess. I always think that.. and I always value each "tick".. Hope is gone, but you can bring it back!
*Mary*

[trainwreck]

The last stanza improved the whole poem overall. Great job! Congrats on coming in second.

[hunterchick]

nice

[Coyote Poetry]

Time can be a negative thing. When we don't have enough. Can get us in big trouble. Thank you for a excellent poem.
Coyote

[Kloverfield]

Very good. Certainly has the rhythm and movement of a clock and sounds mechanical, which is very nice when mixed with emotion like your heart and loss.