Back in time

When I hear people say that "they wish that they could go back in time and tell themselves what they know now", a hundred different things flash through my head. The first thing I picture is how different my life would be. Instead of standing there talking to you, I would have run. I would have run away knowing that if I didn't, I was going to spend years of my life hurting over you. I wouldn't have broken up with certain people so easily because I would know that we could work through our problems and that fighting with them is better than crying over you. I could redo a million and one things, but after thinking about all of them I realize that if I could go back and tell myself what I know now, I would tell myself not to change a god damn thing, because honestly, I would rather be hurt, and cry over the pain that you constantly put me through than try to be in love with someone else. I love you too much and I know it doesn't make any sense but I would rather love you and see you happy with someone else. I would rather feel all of the pain and heartbreak that you have put me through over all of the years than to wish that I had never loved you at all. Because even just knowing you and being a part of your life even though you don't feel the same, is worth it all to me.