If This is Love Then What is it Really?

This is a subject that means a lot to me and if you get offended well I'm sorry for caring about something...

When people see me, they see pain and emo. When he looks at me, he sees the "love of his life" or so he says. I don't want to be seen as just another emo girl; I want to be seen for more than who I appear to be. I pour my heart and soul out onto paper or into music and on the surface no one sees how much I hurt. No one sees everything that I'm going through because no one bothers to look deeper into someone. Everyone is so obsessed with the fact that they are the center of attention; they think that no matter what they do they'll still be loved by "everyone" but they were never loved. Love- a noun- an intense feeling of deep affection. Is that the true meaning of love? Love, in my opinion, doesn't have a meaning, we are never truly loved. Love is not something we can define or receive or give out. We can't just give out a meaningless thing and call it affection. Why do people find it okay to do this? Why can't people understand that they have to show that they care and that they want you? I don't think people understand how much it hurts when someone claims that they feel a meaningless thing towards you and they don't show you that they want you and that you mean something to them. It can really kill a person on the inside to just get the feeling that "maybe they care about me" just to see them run off with someone else and all the sudden that feeling of "love" is gone. It's just gone. It's like you were never loved by that person ever. Maybe that's why we are so scared to go out and find someone to care for and to get cared for by them. We are so scared of being pushed away like we never once mattered to them. I guess that's why I'm so scared to be told that someone "loves" me because I don't want to feel abandoned again, it hurts too much.