Broken Heart

How someone feels when they get left behind, especially a girl.

You left me.

I don't know where are you.

You left a note:

"You are as beautiful as a butterfly,

But am sorry my love

We can't be together.

Because I can't love you

As you want me to."

My heart is broken,

Like a shattered mirror

On the floor.

In thousand pieces.

No-one can put it together.

No-one can dare to pick it up.

No-one can fill it with love.

No-one can take place in that

Broken heart.

But...

You could put it together.

You could dare pick it up.

You could fill it with love.

You could take place in that.

However, you aren't here.

You can't do any of that.

My heart is broken.

And it will stay like that.

For my whole life.

It will get a designation of

Broken heart.

Author's Note

Please do tell me how is this one..
This is first sad poem I wrote (I guess).
Enjoy!!

Reviews

[The dark story]

so beautiful and nice and heart touching...........i really liked the second stanza.the comparison of the broken heart to the broken mirror is just so sublime and great.the diction you have used is pretty nice too......but something is wrong in the fifth line of the first stanza,revise it.anyway.great work my friend....

[Anonymous Girl]

Oh I did that on purpose to make it look like a conversation :)
Thanks for the review :)

[The dark story]

it's my pleasure!!!1

[Emma Ruth]

I love your metaphor of the broken mirror - very powerful; I really enjoyed this, despite the sadness x

[Anonymous Girl]

Thanks :)

[Toni Blackerby]

this is how i felt when my first love hurt me and i can still feel the crack in my heart , this poem is amazing and i love it

[Anonymous Girl]

Thanks for reading :)

[Toni Blackerby]

ur welcome

[Emma Lee-Riviera]

It's got a nice rhythm, and it's very straightforward, like you're sending someone a letter and saying this to them. I think that gives the work a very melodic quality. Well done, thank you for the read request!

[Anonymous Girl]

Thank you for reading and you are welcome :)

[Katherine Enma Pineappl..]

You remind me of somebody I know :)

But anyway I like the feel of this poem it's.... truthful... It feels truthful perhaps because I can relate.

Broken hearts really are mirrors, when you fix it and glue it together, won't there be cracks too?

Nice write :)

[Anonymous Girl]

Yes there will be cracks that can't be fixed :)
Thanks for the review :)

[Katherine Enma Pineapple]

you're welcome

[∠( ᐛ 」..]

Such a strong and amazing poem.
Great work
100/100

[Anonymous Girl]

Thanks Roxast :)

[Brianna Van Zandt]

This is beautiful. I love it. Emotional and it has truth in the words, since heartbreak can remain as a scar on one's heart for the rest of their lives.

[Anonymous Girl]

That's true... And thank you :)

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

A very relatable tale of broken heart....very true in the fact that it can remain like that for ones whole life....unless find someone special...
great write :)

[Anonymous Girl]

Thank you :)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

If this is from experience, and I am guessing it is then it is sad. Young people should live and not be too tied. The mistake of generations was to believe that getting together produced the perfect relationship. No longer. Live, experience then decide! The poem is so well constructed apart form what I think is a lazy error:
'No-one can take place in that' should read:
'No-one can take his place in me'
Personally I would end the piece there however if tou continue make the next stanza the last and drop the final stanz
The final

[Anonymous Girl]

Thank you for the long review and I'll try and amend my mistakes next time :)

[Violet Dreams...]

Gr8 work

[Anonymous Girl]

Thanks :)