Stars in the sky

I told you my secrets,

you carried them away

into the darkness
before the sun announced
the day.

Reviews

[jesserose99]

wow...Tee, this is so fluid. This is absolutely amazing, the depth of the metaphor of the darkness carrying the stars away is brilliant..of course this is exactly what happens but told in the most poetic way possible. I am so delighted I had the opportunity to read this.

[Mara]

thank you so much for your kind review, really appreciate it :)!

[Alias]

So sweet and well crafted. The length just massively enhances the sentiment and yet leaves a sense of mystery since there's no context, you could attach whatever story you liked... beautiful - love it!x

[Mara]

Thanks for your kind review and for checking it out:)!

[Crystal Overmeyer-Birmi..]

Wow. Just wow. The imagery alone is breath taking. The symbolism of someone stealing your pain in the night. My goodness its a great one. Tucking this one away for a rainy day

[Mara]

thank you for your lovely review!, im glad you liked it ! :)

[terry smith]

that is a lot of secrets....and the sun ( your true love ) comes and washes them all away...nice!

[Mara]

thank you :)!!

[terry smith]

don't thank me you wrote it..i just appreciate reading it

[Robert]

Short but very telling. I liked reading this, keep it up Tee.

[Mara]

thank you!:)

[dan]

Tee, Your wisdom in your writing belies your age. I find short pieces difficult to write but this piece you've done is so cohesive and spelled out exceedingly well. Wisdom is usually dripped out in a sequence; this short sequence will stand the test of time. Great piece! take care...dan

[Mara]

I'm the opposite, i find it difficult to write long pieces :)! Thank you for checking it out and for the kind review:)!

[B. Boileau]

I love this ! so many different takes within one little verse... this really is a brilliant piece.
bill

[Mara]

Thank you so much:)!!

[Southern_Writes]

Whispers in the night. I envy those able to write so much with so little.
Well done

[Mara]

Thank you glad you liked it :)

[A hare off]

cosmic confessions, what an exquisite thought in this short poem. Your poem whispers to the reader and so beautifully at that. Thank you for sharing and inviting us into your wonderful thoughts.

[Mara]

thank you for your kind review :)!

[ExquisiteEyes]

A short and deep poem full of metaphors. It flows extremely well

[Mara]

thank you :)!

[McBear]

Very clean and beautiful.

I watched the stars in the sky as they flew along by.
Up above in the sky, I watch them dance;
a wonderful dance, with the ones I once loved.

Wrote this from inspiration of your poem

[Mara]

thats beautiful :D thank you!